Hubris.co.nz

Sleep in goooooooood. Boring day, reading Herald nice and relaxing. Lying back in bed after shower even nicer, listening to the CD I bought in Sydney even better. I love Kini.

Eventually Clayt, Jeremy Renee and I headed off to Long Bay – or is it Long Beach and are we ganstas? – for Jody’s bbq gettogether. Long drive, but it was in Jeremy’s car, which has red plush on the backseats, so that was cool. Actually, it reminded me heaps of Craccum Gareth’s car, so that was entertaining.

Jody’s friends are a little ummm – cliquey – but she’s still one of the coolest people I know. We called Shirley and got her and Richard to come from section 2 to section 13. While the boys were trying to barbeque, her and I went wading, me carrying my jeans above my skirt, and it was really cool. We had the best talk too. She said something about how it’s been cool for her to watch me change over the years and to see me growing stronger, and I agree. Yeah, good good good talk, an and I feel nice afterwards. BBQ’ed sausages were actually super nice, despite the fact that they’d seemed a little dubious. Jody etc packed up and left cos the park shut its gate at 9pm (Shirley and Jeremy had the good sense to move their cars out of the gate earlier). We’d just finished eating when Shirley and I started yelling at each other, baiting to go swimming, so I had to, stripping off to a slip and knickers knickers knickers behind a bush. We’d been drinking bubbly from plastic cups and it was getting dark which made it easier. Swinning was absolutely lovely. The water was warm and really really real, and I was with Shirley, who I love to pieces. My boobs would occasionally pop outta my slip, but generally when I was under water, and like she said -s he’s seen it all before anyways. We pledged to go Orgasm Shopping together. Heh.

It was dark and stuff, so I put my clothes back on – comando actually in my jeans, and I was bitching about it, so Clay was like “oooohkay” so i got mad and yelled “if you guys can hear in detail about how to give head, you can damn well listen to how uncomfortable I am that I’m not wearing underwear” and he conceeded I was right, so I chuckled lots and probably clutched at him to stay upright. Then, walking back to the car, we came across a children’s play area, so we had to stop and play. I freaked out totally over teh flying fox, because I was never a fan, even as a kid, but I was drunk enough to try it out, figuring the grass was soft enough to fall onto, and it was sooooo cool. I was screaming and laughing the whole way down, of course. And then we were playing in the fort, which was a bubbley structure pretty much like they have at every Burger King. As I’m a little larger than your average kid, I managed to get semi stuck in one part of it, but luckily my legs bend in all sorts of ways so I could untangle myself and go down the tunnel slide, shrieking all the way. It was cool. The drive home I spent going “Hurry up! Hurry up!” because I really needed to pee. Jeremy’s boycotting Shell becasue of their actions in Nigeria – good on him. I wish I followed all the No Logo ethics.

Anyways, back at home, Brad was all grumpy, so Clay and I decided to go without him. I changed my clothes and stuff, and paid Jeremy $5 to drive us (skinfl

Okay, this is SUCH a bad sign, that’s it’s 3.15am on Tuesday morning and I’m still awake, unable to sleep so I’m at my computer, shivering in my slip and writing a journal entry. Arrrgh fucking aarrrgh fucking grr. Mind is very wound up right now, eh. Just a little bit. If I hadn’t left it in the lounge where Anji is sleeping, I’d be rehersing my speech right now. I mean, hey, I wrote it at 3am a couple’o nights ago anyways!

From midday until 9.45pm, I was in the computer lab, working on our broadcasting assignment. Well, that included a break for a trip to the bank (damn you Internet banking that promises to do rent transfers and then doesn’t) dinner with Andrea at Boiger King (misspelling intentional to proclaim pronounciation) and a five minute phone interview with a reporter from the Herald. Hi, I’m Joanna McLeod, and I want a job producing content for the Internet. Bob King asked me to answer the reporter’s questions, as apparently, I’m a sort of spokesperson for the course. Yay me! I was actually really proud, especially when the PR woman in Bob’s office who was doing name-badge stuff for the expo whilst listening to me told me I’d given a good interview.

Today I wrote a story about microchips in vending machines that make their products talk that went along with a video piece Trevor and Andrea did. I also did some page laying out, and wrote blurbs about the people in our group, and that kind of stuff. I was so so so proud to teach trevor how to align pictures to the left right in the middle of the text – something people who never used Frontpage Express or any other really bad WYSIWYG programs might never have learnt. And Joe and I did a layout in Fireworks that worked real nice. Wahoo. Yeah, sweet ass. Anyways, around 9.30pm I got a call from Garland and when I answered my cellie, the voice was liek “Hello stinky poo” so I realised that my family had arrived at my flat, so they agreed to come pick me up from tech. Goddamit, it’s SO cool having your parents pick you up from stuff – I think that’s what I miss most living in a flat. They were all hungry, so I took them to D72, but the kitchen was closed, so I suggested bread and hummus from foodtown, and got aggressive defending that situation, because I was just waaaaay too tired to think about another cafe. And as Mum and Neil and Anji had just driven up from welly, they were pretty tired too and took my advice.

Back at home, we ate yummy things on bread (brie! baba ganosh! smoked beef! parents’ money!) and drank (parents wine, Anji and I the last of my vodka) and watched first Clayton’s brilliant documentary on BFM, t then his sitcom. It was the third time I’ve seen the sitcom (and the doco, actually) but I think the tiredness and alcohol proved to be a winning combination, cos i kept giggling and giggling. Then I showed them the Flat Video, that covers my audition for Life On Tape – talking about kicking out Leyton, Clay’s 20th birthday dinner and Simon dancing, Brad doing spicegirl moves for my CD ROM, and our Survivor Final Episode Party. They were very very impressed, and laughed a lot. Then Mum and Neil went to their motel which is just 100 metres down the road – I worked there for all of two days – and Anji and I had another drink. We had the absolute best gossip. It was Anji who told me all the way back in 5th form that giving blow jobs was empowering, and I’m very grateful for that advice – even if I didn’t give one to my best friend’s b/f like she was suggesting at the time. Thanks Anji and Cosmo – my god, how scary is it the first time you go down on someone and you have no fucking idea what you’re doing? Until you remember Cosmo going “there’s no wrong way to give head” and you relax a little, that is. I think drinking from Pint Glasses probably wasn’t the smartest move ever, eh. What you think is a reasonable three drinks is more like six. AND I STILL CAN’T SLEEP! GRR! I hate being so intelligent and thinking so much!

I’m reading this really good book r ight now which I can’t for the life of me remember the name of – something about Johnny Thunder, and it’s about a girl falling for the wrong guy, and her lifestyle reminds me of Anji, and the writing of it’s so real I can see every scene, and if my light was on, I would tell you the name of the book so that you can read it too, but it’s all dark and stuff, cos I’ve been trying to sleep for ages, so I can’t tell you. Woah, that was a very long sentence. Sometimes I think you need a map to navigate these journal entries of mine. My eyes hurt, so I should probably crawl back into bed now. I’m so so so nervous about tomorrow -it’s the first day of the expo, and I’m making a speech and all. One of the grad dips came up to me today and said she was really glad it was me making the speech, since I’d done so well presenting our project to the class, and I just thought that was really really lovely of her. But yeah. I think I’m going to go shopping with mummy tomorrow to find something to wear – I haven’t washed my new media pants yet, and I really should have. I didn’t expect to be at tech so late. “Maybe later – I’ve got creamy goodness in my mouth right now”

Monday the 11th of January, 1999

Anji and Karen came over and Mummy made us Tempura for dinner and it was really really yummy. She was such a good Japanese housewife, standing and cooking us some more cos we are all greedy pigs, but she’d had enough to eat. I’m so glad I like food. Sure, I don’t exactly have a spiffing figure, but at least I have FUN!

When we were about to have dessert, Anji was like “Okay, who’s going to spread the jellytip icecream on me and lick it off?” Then she veered off in some other conversation, but made the mistake of standing next to me, and the icecream tub. It was just too tempting. I picked a hunkajelly out and slapped it onto her tummy. She squealed, appropriately surprised, and picked off the lump. But then she wanted me to lick off the remaining traces. I’d never licked someone’s belly before. I can’t say it was all that exciting – despite her belly button ring. Honest we don’t live in Kentucky, just cos she only wore her bra and camos to the dinner table. We’re just um… a very close family. God, you should hear our conversations if you think our actions are bad. Anji’s new short haircut inspired a ‘dykey’ tinged conversation, and oh boy, carpet licking is a weird terminology for your parents to need translated. I remember waaaaaaay back when my mother thought a blow job was something you got done at the hairdresser’s. Not that I was really in the know when I was nine either, but still, that’s to be expected, right?

When I was ten, the trendiest book at school was “Forever” by Judy Blume. Anyone who had a copy passed it around, and we all knew chapters 7, 9 and 16 were the juiciest. The thing that none of us got was that the girl and guy in it kept coming. I mean, they were already THERE in the room, and they hadn’t been anywhere. The phrase came up too much to put it down to a grammatical error, so eventually I asked Karen and Anji what it meant. They refused to tell me and made me ask my mother. She was like “where did you hear that?????” but eventually she told me, which left me even more confused than before. I think ‘white liquids’ were mentioned. Golly.

When I was eight, I stole ‘My Lady, My Vixen’ from Anji, and read most of that, even though I wasn’t allowed to. It was one of those books that had a chick with her dress half ripped off and a brawny guy under giant shiny letters on the cover. I’d been sneakily reading it in my room, but then I left it hidden under my pillow and Mum went into my room to make my bed. BUSTED! I never found out how it ended. I did learn a lot about ‘his pulsating manhood’ though. Ahhhh crazy kids.

All my stuff is packed now, apart from my puter and my stereo. Stress City, man! My parents don’t want me to leave too much stuff for them to take up cos they wanna take stuff up too two days later bringing my stuff up, but Si won’t have much room in his car….. Arrrrrrg. I’m sure I’ll forget something vital.

Shit. This is the end of my time in Wellington, at least until April. Anji’s probably going overseas before then, and she was like “I might never see you again” – drama queen. And Karen might take an unexpected turn for the worst, or anything. Shit. Again.

But nah, it’ll be cool. Okay, Puter’s going into a box now. Say Bye Bye!

See you AFTER.

PS would you be scared to learn you’re being watched from afar?