Hubris.co.nz

You know, I’d decided that I was going to start this entry out by pondering how the hell people did the Big Day Out without cellphones, but then I was forced to remember. Oh yeah, if you have my number, can you please text me your name (or email me your number?)? Yeah, that’s right, it’s new Sim Card and phone time. Same number though. Stupid fucking D List ‘celebrities’.

But we can scoot backwards in time, to Thursday morning and I’m leaving the backdoor key out for our downstairs neighbour Eve so that she can look after Sebastian that night since Anji had already flown to Auckland for work, and loading my bags into Lisa Fur’s car boot and folding myself into the backseat because Fran was in the front. And then it’s a week later, and I’m switching from present tense into past, because I’m not a choose-your-own adventure book, as much as I’d like to be. A quick study guide to the BDO was playing on the stereo, and there was a monkey to show the country to. Goats were thrown at first sightings of mountains, which resulted in the people in front of us pulling aside to let us pass. The toilets in Tirau are still the best place in the country to stop, and driving into Auckland still sort of feels like a kick in the guts six years later. Lisa’s car made it on one tank of petrol though, which is incredible.

Heather wasn’t home for Fran to be dropped off to, so we headed to the place that Lisa and I were staying, the Comfort Inn on Newton Road. We’d scored ourselves a big two bedroom apartment with parking for only $65 a night each, sweet sweet accomodation candy. Heather showed up and had some beers, and we headed up the road to Gina’s for dinner. If you’re not familiar with Auckland, Gina’s is (in)famous for its ridiculously hot and over-the-top waiters. The food’s pretty good too, but it’s insanely busy, and took a long time, and it was very very crowded. We went back to the apartment and had more wine. I love the litre bottles of Banrock.

The next day it was Friday and therefore bdoing day. Lisa and I went to meet up with Heather and Fran at Roasted, and then I called an incredibly incompetant taxi driver who took half an hour to find us and kept calling me on my cellie. We got there just before Pluto started. I forgot how many people go to the Big Day Out. There were a lot of people there. Pluto were okay. They played some new songs which was nice, and drums were pounded very heartily, but I just don’t know if their heart is in it anymore. Then I put my earplugs back in (hurray for being a grown-up!) and waded through the crowd trying to get out of the stupid (but I’m sure it’s important when the stadium is actually full) D-Barrier. Texts to Lisa found her again, and we went and got our passes for the Immortals Lounge, courtesy of a wonderful friend.

I felt special as we got to ride the big glass elevator up to the sky. We got to use cleanish bathrooms, and the bar queue was short and there was a better selection (but only Lion Red or Steinie, so I saw that it would be a beer-free day for me). The view was very choice. Then it was time to skootch back down to the Green stage for Sleater Kinney. I wish I knew their music better. If ever there was going to be a replacement for Hole in my “strong women make me feel strong” listening, it could very well be them.

Breaks Coop were playing next, and I’m not a repetitive old woman so I decided to run away quickly to a clean bathroom up in the Immortals Lounge again. I checked the time on my cellphone while I was up there, and bought a drink, and then discovered that my phone was gone. Rad. I went through my bag and looked on the floor by the bar. No phone. Excellent. Then Lisa showed up, luckily, and after asking at the bar after my phone, we went down to see the Go! Team. It made me feel very grumpy though, losing phones sucks. I was going to try calling it from Lisa’s phone but realised I’d never hear it.

Then the Go! Team started, and they were fantastic, and I had a boogie, despite my knees being already like “hey lady, remember us? We don’t like this kind of behaviour one little bit”. I wish I could shake my bottom like Ninja. Fuck it – I wish I was Ninja. Their album is definitely going on my ‘to buy’ list.

I can’t remember when it was that the Brunettes started to play, but I took a photo of all the people on stage.

Someone said that there were 20 people in the orchestra (You don’t expect me to actually try and count do you?). Their rider can’t go very far. I wish I’d stayed for them, but I’d already realised that I am much too old for the Big Day Out.

My knees led me over to the fence by the beer area and I sat down for the Magic Numbers and took some Nurofen Plus. Mmm codeieney. But people don’t look at the ground when they’re walking, and they kept kicking or tripping over my legs – despite the fact that there were people sitting all the way along against the fence, and it was just pissing me off too much so I decided to pop up to the Immortals Lounge again. More liquor and more codeine was taken, and I pulled an armchair up to the window at the back of the lounge and settled down for Shihad:

They played their standard fare. If I hadn’t been so doped up, I might have been a little sad that I wasn’t in the mosh, but then again, if I had been, I wouldn’t have been able to see how fantastic the crowd’s arms looked when they did ‘Pacifier’. But I was, so that was okay. When I felt lonely I had another drink. Haha excellent. Then a guy who was Kateb’s brother’s best friend growing up who’s now in a band that I interviewed for Pulp a while ago came over and hugged me, and tried to introduce me to his fiance, but given that she was a friend of Kateb’s at uni, I already knew her. And that was the only people at the Big Day Out who I bumped in to, apart from Jessie. That was strange, cos I am used to seeing so many people I know there, and I was actually a little bit afraid of who I might bump in to.

Franz Ferdinand played, and they were pretty average, and my arm chair was very comfortable. Then Iggy started, and I was like “what the fuck am I doing? This is the Big Day Out and I’m sitting up here like those wankers that I hate at gigs who only go because they get in free, and they don’t even like music”, and plus the BDO book talked about a cocktail bar in Lilyworld, so I went off to find that. Apparently, the cockails are only in Australia. I also couldn’t find the Krishna food stall, so I had a $9 kebab instead because I realised that I’d had one TEN YEARS AGO at my first Big Day Out, and washed it down with a Lion Red, Mate. I contemplated having a dance, but I was too chicken/sober to dance by myself with the models. Did I bitch about the girl carrying the Nova bag yet? I mean, hi, you’re wearing high heels and an expensive looking dress, and you’re stick thin and gorgeous. We get the point. You’re a model. You don’t need to tell us what agency you’re with. If I was to bitch about the other 30,000 people there though it would take far too long. I’m too old and jaded. And I was also kind of lonely. It’s fine to be by yourself at the Big Day Out if it’s your choice, but if you’re just a lost puppy who can’t contact people cos no one has handed your phone in, then it sucks.

I sat at the back of the stadium and took photos of the human lightening people, who could have been a lot more impressive than they actually are:

Then the White Stripes started.

They looked kind of cool, but the sound was craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaappy at the back there, and I couldn’t stomach going up closer.

I went to go and wait at the rendevouz spot that I’d (phew!) arranged with Lisa earlier in the day, and then Jessie was there, and I was like YAY and hugged her and felt a bit like I did that one time at the Gathering when I found Katy and Anji after I’d been lost for a couple of hours and thought tents were frozen bodies from Titanic and that there were Jim Henson creatures walking around me and I’d lost the ability to speak, except, you know, without the acid. And Lisa showed up, and Fran, and we got told off for walking on the road by a policeman, and we took a taxi and we went home, hurray! It was strange to leave a Big Day Out and still be able to walk and not have my ears ringing,and I wasn’t too badly sunburnt except for my nose. I am no longer hardcore. I miss being hardcore.

On Saturday Lisa and I met Heather and Jamie from NZM at Benediction. I’ve decided that avocado on turkish bread is quite possibly one of the best breakfasts ever. Then I made Heather come to St Lukes with me, and I used a Farmers voucher leftover from Xmas to get myself a new phone. Then, of course, I went back to her house to charge my phone and check my email, because that’s the only reason I’m friends with her. I also got to watch Alt TV, and I wet my pants in delight at seeing a Guns’n Roses video that I’d forgotten even existed. Awesome.

I went home and had a bath and tried to nap but it was too hot so I read magazines and texted people back going “who is this?” because of the lack of numbers. Exciting, yes, I know. Luckily my social secretary KateH had booked us all for a dinner at 8pm at Canton. Holy crap I love the food there, it’s soooooo good. And for $16 each, we certainly ate plenty. Then people came back for some more drinks, and someone called me trying to arrange a booty-call for the morning (*) and I was metaphorically speechless.

This is Shirley and KateH and her boyfriend Andrew:

This is Maree, who was up from Hamilton for the weekend:

This is J.C and Nigel, who is doing his best J.D Fortune look, while claiming never to have watched ‘INXS: Rockstar’:
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What’s more interesting than looking at photos of people you don’t know? Relating dialogue from the night? Yeah, so I’ll stop this now. On Sunday Lisa and I drove back down to Wellington. I like visiting my friends in Auckland. I love the Arcade Fire. The end.

1. I’ve long finished rereading all the Narnia books, and god bless the No Logo in me, I had a dream the other night that was a cross between Prince Caspian and The Last Battle, where i was with a group of the last desperately free animals and so forth, adn they got all excited saying that when we took back Cair Parvel, they could get credit cards and go shopping at The Warehouse, and I was like “NOOOOOOOOOO”.

2. I have also read Harry Potter 2 and 3, and they’re okay, but they seriously don’t stand up to C.S Lewis, although the whole kiddie-Internet-Porn aspect of the Chamber of Secrets was amusing (oh come on, young girls SHOULD NOT be writing in diaries to random strangers!)

3. There’s an ad for our flat up on the channel z website, clearly stating the cost’o the rooms, and that there’s OSP. I got this email about it: “Hi Joanna Just seen your advert on the channelz site for a flatmate. Im 23 yr old prof male. Is there off street parking? How much are you charging for the room? Im a great guy to have around on those mornings when your car wont start! Cheers” On second reading, I realised that his email address is wrx_channelz@* . I’m not very enthusiastic about the idea of him moving in, eh.

4. We had our last ever Party At The Slab. Much sangria was consumed. It was fun.

6. The Departure Lounge has put in booths now, yay. However, they’re now serving Allpress instead’o Gravity. Semi-boo – it’s still nice though.

7. I would like back the three hours of my life that I just gave to Pearl Harbor tonight please.

8. Clay and Bo have both started boxing stuff up. WAAAH!

9. I very very much need to find some flatmates ASAP. Gorgeous house in Balmoral, and all that good stuff. Tell your friends. Email me. Thank you.

10. I got rather drunk at the Admin lunch on Friday. Office ladies oggling waiters – scary.

11. If you’re planning on sending me Xmas pressies (or my late birthday present even) you should email me for my new address, or send them to my parents’ house, cos I am moving out in ONE WEEK’S TIME.

12. I dropped my cellphone in a glass of water. D’oh. If anyone has an old vodaphone they wanna lend me til after Xmas, I will kiss your feet. I miss txts, especially Tom, like crazy.

13. I can’t even afford Therapy anymore. Ick.

(Picking up the narrative about Saturday night from yesterday)
It was also nice that it was good wholesome alcohol free fun too, for a change. Not that it’d last though…..

Half the crew disappeared off to town, taking Andy with them, but me Clay Brad and Kate M weren’t sure if we wanted to go, so we decided to meet up at the Dog, cos Kate B was supposed to be working. Brad got in Kate M’s car, and I took Clay and Pete. Half way home, Clay called Kara @Garland, and there was a little domestic or something, so I had to take him home. We tried to call Brad or Kate M to let them know, and to see if they’d follow us to Garland so we could leave my car and all go with Kate M to Ponsonby. But noooo, of course neither of them had their cellies with them, so it turned into a mad game of chase, with me yelling at them although they couldn’t hear me, because the boys didn’t roll down their windows. You know how you’re not supposed to drive drunk (and I don’t)? Well, I think you shouldn’t be allowed to drive on that much sugar either. It was lots and lots and lots of fun though! We finally managed to make them follow us and not take the Newton off-ramp, but then just as they rolled down their windows to hear us yell we were going to Garland, they were on the Grafton offramp and we were on Manukau/Hamilton. People with cellularmaphones that don’t turn them on are dumb!

But anyways, we got home and I changed my shoes and Brad rang us from Kate M’s. Pete and I decided to drive to her dad’s house and leave my car there, and walk to the Dog. So that’s just what we did, stopping for Red Bull. By the time we got to her house, Kate M had fallen asleep, so only Brad came out with us. By the time we got to the Dog, it was past 1am, and the place was closed. We could see Kate sitting with the staff at the bar, but they pretended they didn’t see us banging on the windows. So we had to move on, and found ourselves at Grand Central. The front bit was full of Old Slappers dancing to dumb music, but we managed to snag ourselves a room all to ourselves; sofas around a fireplace with a chandelier above – a super cosy living room. We had a bottle of wine and texted Hayley, to find out that everyone was at Deschlers. Bottle finished, and we set out to walk to Deschlers.

It’s a long walk from Ponsonby to town! Well, maybe not THAT long, but 20 minutes or so, which is long when it’s cold and you’re already tired from dancing and haven’t drunk that much. But I shouldn’t whine, cos it was actually kinda fun. At Deschlers, everyone was already squozen (see, that word sounds so good when you say it, but you can’t write it down) into booths so we pulled up seats at the counter and had more drinks….

Bah, I’m bored of telling that story already. Maybe I’ll finish it tomorrow. Or maybe not. I got my hair cut today, and it looks cool. Since I got it done somewhere I’d had it done before, they had a file on me, and I saw that the last time I had a haircut there it was April 5th, so I looked back in my journal to see what my trauma’o the day then was. I only ever get haircuts when I’m excited or when I’m sad. Oh, I had a haircut in Melbourne actually, but that was in the kitchen of Anji’s flat, and it was done by her friend Ang. Incidently, you know the Libra ad for Charlies Angels that’s in a bright pink hair salon? That’s where Anji’s old flatmate works. He wanted me to get a mullet, because apparently they’re back, but I resisted. But that was all a tangent, because the woman today just cut my hair how I wanted it, whilst going on about how tall I was. However, I forgive her for that because she gave my head a massage while washing my hair, and I just about purred. I’ve decided I don’t want a boyfriend anymore – I want a hairdresser. Does it make them whores that I pay them money for the physical pleasure they give me?

Kate B came home at lunchtime today and said “oh you’re having a champange lunch” and me and Shirley and Jeremy said “yes”, and I waited for her to ask why, but she didn’t. That amused me.

Tonight Maree lured us around by making us cookies and promising to rent us a video – a NEW RELEASE even. We watched “Drop Dead Gorgeous” which was very very funny, but went on a little too long. She woke me up AGAIN at 7am this morning when she came in wearing her pajamas. I begged her not to do that last night and all! I should really go lock the dead bolt, but I need her to wake me up tomorrow morning. We’re going to have coffee before she goes to be a Teacher’s Helper at her kid’s school, and I go off to work.

Oh yes, I got a job. WAHOO! I’m not actually starting tomorrow, because by law I need 7 days to review my contract, but I am going in tomorrow to meet the staff, and to get my contract and get some background readings. I’m so stoked that I didn’t even need to interview for the job, because I met the big boss at the Expo and he was more than happy for me to come work for them, and I’d already been recomended for the position. So, a week after tech finally ended, I already have a full time job. It’s only contracted til February, but still, it’s experiance… and money. Yay! I’m very very nervous though.

“am I famous for just one thing?”

Monday 15; Febuary, 1999

Trudie: “Whenever I hear the word ‘stalker’ I think of you, Joanna”

Ten thirty am, the phone rings. I figure it’s either not for me, or it’s Shirley, so I drag my ass outta bed a little while later to check the message. I was right – it WAS Shirley. So I rang her back, and she told me that she and Trudie were meeting up with Dee in Mission Bay at 2pm, and did I want to come along? Of course I did! So she said that Trudie could pick me up on her way in – Trudie’s flatting with Shirley now, you see. So yeah. Since I was already up at that god awful hour, I figured I may as well be domesticated, so I did the dishes, and hung out the (still icky) curtains on the line. Man, it was so foul – something in them turned the water & bleach all yellow, so it looked like they were soaking in piss. How’s that for a nice visual?

So yeah, after doing all that, I went back to bed. But I couldn’t get back to sleep because it was so light outside, and there’s construction happening just up the road. I just laid down for a while instead. Last night, I couldn’t sleep either so I lay in bed and listened to the whole of Little Earthquakes. I wish that I could turn my brain off at night, so that I don’t have a billion and one thoughts racing through my head at all times. I wish I could various stuff in my life straighted out, cos it’s all so weird right now. I wish – well – I wish a lot.

Eventually, after I’d showered and asked Clayton how his night had been (including a “spare me details please”) I heard my cellphone ringing. It was Trudie, asking me where I live – cos she didn’t know, and Shirley hadn’t considered that. So yeah, cellphones are good because Trudie didn’t have my real number, and I think Clayton was on the phone anyways. So yeah, she came over, and just before she got here, Shirley rang to ask us to go BACK to their place to pick her up, but apparently, it was on the way anyways. Off we puttered in Buttercup, Trudie’s bright yellow old Honda Civic. I say putter, because she drove UNDER the speed limit the whole way, which is a concept that’s kind of new to me, given the kind of riffraff I generally hang out with.

Anyways, we met up with Dee eventually, and settled down in a cafe I remember from a year ago while frantically flathunting. Dee, being 20, popped around the corner to the bottle store, and so we had byo bubbly (apparently she got stuff that was like $20 a bottle too) and plates of food to share. And of course, a great big huge long gossip session. Maaaan we all can talk. I was kinda nasty as usual, but they all know I don’t mean it. They talked about CRICKET though, for fucks sake! So yeah. Then we went and got icecream. Then Shirley and Dee got Burger King. Mmmmmm and yet they’re still the tiniest people in the world. I feel like such a freak walking out with them, cos I’m about a foot taller – and that’s hardly an exageration.

So yeah anyways, we swung past Shirley’s so that I could liberate their fudge cake (they’d had too much of it) so in return I gave them half the huge bag of plums that Clayton’s granny had given us. We weren’t going to be able to eat them before they rotted. So yeah.

Make-Out Monday, veging in front of the TV. Clayton cooked dinner, for Layton the Lurker as well who’d shown up. Maybe I shouldn’t be so harsh, because he did give me a mouse pad – one that even has wrist support too – Yay. But still, he’s just – I dunno……. weird. I can’t wait till Sisi gets back so there’s someone that I can be completely relaxed around about.

I have to go into town for Orientation tommorrow, and maybe do a little bit of stalking. We’ll see. Arrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggg I’ve got such a sugar rush right now, and I’m just going really mental and there’s like, no one online right now to talk to except for Heidi, and much as I love her, she’s not as good to gossip to as Andee. I misssssssssss Andee. Sure, she’s supposed to come and stay this weekend, but I need her NOW, dammit!

Friday 12; Febuary, 1999
I was smart and turned my cellphone off last night (or this morning at some heinous hour to be perfectly honest, although I won’t tell you the exact hour because it shocks even me). This morning I woke up to the sound of a toilet flushing, which completely freaked me out. I mean, I should have been the only person in the house. So I opened up my door and there was Clayton in the hall – obviously home from the Coramandel. I went back to bed, after turning my cellphone back on.

I woke up again around 1pm when it beeped at me with a page from Olivia. I’d had two messages before then from Justine, but I’d slept through those. So yeah, it was good to get a wake-up call. Kate yelled at me yesterday that I need to reset my body clock for when Tech starts again. I kinda like living four hours behind the rest of the world apart from Andee and Thomas but then again, Andee’s moving back to Hamilton on Saturday so I won’t be able to talk to her on the net anymore anyways. And plus, now Clayton’s back, I can’t have music blasting out at all hours. Boy, it’s going to be weird living with someone again. I’d gotten so used to the solitaire thing. This is probably healthier – no more toast for dinner.

And speaking of not eating toast for dinner, I went to the supermarket today. I was going to take a bus up to it, but then I realised that I’d just missed on and I didn’t want to wait another twenty five minutes, so I figured I may as well walk. It’s just as well I did, because Foodtown is actually so much closer than I thought it was. So I did the shopping, trying to keep expenses down, and having no idea really what to buy because I wasn’t shopping for just me. I did buy heaps of shit for myself though, like shampoo and chocolate and red wine (life’s essentials) but that’s going to come out of my pocket, not the communal-yet-to-be-established-fund. Walking down the wine aisle, I accepted a taste-cup of some red that tasted a lot like a white, because it hadn’t been oaked. I guess it was the sun, and the fact that I hadn’t eaten all day, but I felt all light-headed and warm after that. Made the shopping better I guess.

I took a cab home, because there was no way I could haul all the groceries home otherwise. My driver was this really cool chick, and we just babbled away the whole distance home. It was $5, so that’s cool – not too much to spend for saving so much hassle. It’s nice to have food in the cupboards again. I was even inspired to do a little cleaning and tidying.

It’s weird now though, cos like I said, Clayton’s back and so I feel like I have to be tidy and polite and stuff. No big deal really, but I can’t scratch myself, or sit with my skirts hiked up now or anything. I don’t want to traumatise the lad.

There was something I wanted to say, and I can’t remember what it was anymore. I’ve seen the layout for Annette’s Valentines Day thingie, and it rocks. So yeaaaaah baby. Ahhhhhhh Valentine’s Day. So not friendly to single people. Sure, I’m smart enough to see how crappily cheesy and commercial it is, but SO?

Thursday 11; Febuary, 1999
Good Morning Annette!

I hope you weren’t woken up after only around 6 hours sleep by a mad woman pounding on your door. That’s what happened to me today. Well, it was Kate so I guess I shouldn’t say she’s mad, because I know she’ll read this and then beat me up. Hahahaha. So yeah. I let her in and went back to bed, but she didn’t want to sleep with me (that’s sleep, not anything else), she wanted me to go bed shopping with her.

I let her use my computer while I had a shower and got dressed, but I made sure that I shut down ICQ first so she couldn’t do naughty things with it. She wanted to go to this secondhand bed warehouse in Mount Roskill, cos she decided that the bed that I bought, which she was also going to buy, was too expensive. So yeah. I’m so smart, I figured out how to get there and everything. I guess Auckland’s not quite so bad once you get used to it.

We hopped onto plenty of beds in the warehousey place, but decided they were all too ugly – she wanted one with a headboard. Debating the various merits of a double vs a queen, I pointed out that if she was planning on having people stay over, a queen would be better. She said something like “No, I ask them to leave afterwards – and if they won’t, I go sleep elsewhere.” HAHAHA I so love her.

Then we went to a couple more shops down Dominion Road and stuff, and I guided her to Newmarket. We went to Burger King too, so I could get a greatly nutritious breakfast, and we discussed sleeping habits. I’m glad my mother doesn’t read my journal, so that she doesn’t know what shocking care I take of myself. Is that a proper sentence? I hope so. We looked in Freedom, and I drooled over stuff, imagining how cool it’d be to have a house with all new furnishings, but the beds were too expensive. So we went toa bed shop around the corner, where Kate found a cool slatbed with an iron frame (which isn’t as cool as mine) and got $100 off the price because she didn’t want the manchester and pillows and shit. She rocks. I could never bargain with people, man.

Then we went back to her place in Ponsonby, and I met her GORGEOUS kitten Tallulah (tori: “it must be worth losing if it is worth something” – only that song is spelt ‘Talula’) and one of her flatmates called Jared. And I got back my pants, which I’d left there last time I was drunk. I HAD A CHANGE OF CLOTHES, OKAY? Sheesh, I’m not that much of a drunken whore. Oh, and I solved the mystery of the mysterious mud on my shoe from the last time as well – there’s mud in her garage. Phew. It’s always a relief to know how I got dirty.

She drove me home, stopping in to say “hi” to Tamati who gestured and whispered because the big bosses were having a meeting, but he gave me a free piece of cake – pretending to take my money. After Kate had stolen some aper from me, I went online to create a new concept for my site – a Page Me page. This is where you can go to send messages straight to my cellphone. Please do enjoy it. Sure, I know I’m REALLY asking for it this time, but hey, it’ll be an adventure.

I took off my glasses to take a catnap on the bed in the lounge, but then i decided not to sleep and when I stood up I put my foot on them. They’re slipping off my nose now and are ever more crooked than they were before. I haven’t worn my contact lenses in like, a month. I should stop being so lazy and deal with them. Then I can see AND wear sunglasses. And read blackboard menus too. So that’s a trifle annoying, but hey!

In the evening, I watched “Dead Man Walking”. It was sad, and I cried some, but I cried for the victims, not for the prisoner on death row. I was maybe expecting my stance on the death penalty to change, but it hasn’t. I still believe that some murderers and rapists deserve to die. They have destroyed a life, and have therefore given up any rights that they have. It scares me that I can hate so strongly. I sort of wish I could be like Susan Sarandon’s character, able to love, and relinquish hatred for a greater good, but I can’t. And I guess it’s just being able to hate, not having to see two sides of a story or anything like that.

My evening was also peppered with drunken cellphone calls from Clare. She makes me laugh, man! Kini’s friend Anthony scanned in his chest for us, so that’s up on the Breast page. My sixth form diary is sitting open in front of me, so it’s kind of hard to stay focused on writing this entry. I’d much rather read my pathetic little ben-obsessive entries. Speaking of Ben, watch Annette’s page on Valentines Day. She’s launching a little collaborative project then. She’s getting her own domain soon, which’ll be cool cos I’d get to wear a tshirt advertising it. PLUS I’d also have like the most traffic on Vision then, if current stats continue. I’m so selfcentred. At least y’all know what to expect from me though, right?

I wish I knew what to expect from my life right now. Stuff’s kinda spooking me out a little. Don’t be concerned for my sake, it’s just bizzare. One day maybe you’ll read about it all. Just not today.

xoxoxox

Oh yeah and remember to fill in the form on yesterday’s entry if you want to be paged on your vodaphone!!!

Wednesday 10; Febuary, 1999
I couldn’t sleep last night, so i was up till like 4.30am reading “Naked Lunch”. Now, I could sit here and say that I love it, that I can fully understand why it’s considered to be such an important piece of literature, but that’d be lying. Sure, he’s got astonishing descriptions, but a whole ‘novel’s worth is too much. It’s all just short stories and they don’t start and they don’t end and it’s just really bad. Plus, it’s completely nasty, and really scary. So if you have a differing opinion on it, that’s fine. I’m still going to finish it, because I could never put down a book, no matter how bad it was.

I still woke up pretty early though – well, around 11am, because I had calls to make. It’s my mummy’s birthday today, so I wanted to say hi, but she was out so I left a croaky message on her answerphone that sounded like shit instead. I know it sounded bad because I checked her voicemail later. That’s Fun with Phones 101.

I also called Dee, who wasn’t there (which is NOT fun with phones). So I did other stuff instead, tidy and clean a little and stuff like that. I also washed my hair, but it turned out absolutely lousy. Like, I wash my hair every day (if I’m going to be seen in public anyways) because it tends to go quite greasy at the roots, while the ends are too dry. Anyways, it normally looks fine, good, great after I wash it, but today it was fucking shocking. Like, so greasy as if I hadn’t washed it in a week. Honestly, it was that tragic. Oh god, how vain do I sound? It was so icky and greasy. I’m just going to blame the humidity. The fact that there’s no healthy food in the house apart from plums has nothing to do with it, really.

I was going to go to the supermarket, and then i realised that HEY! Clayton’s going to be coming back tomorrow, so why should I spend MY money on food that he’ll eat? I already paid for all the electricity. That sounds petty, but it’s not really. I’ve just become accustomed to living alone.

Anyways, so I was just sitting around, when all of a sudden my cellphone bleeped at me. I picked it up, and was astonished to see a text message scrolling across my screen – something like “stalkstalkstalk hey Jo was just seeing if you were getting showered upon*shags* your #1 stalker”. That completely confused the fuck out of me. I really didn’t know who would have the know-how to send me messages like that. I knew Matt was supposed to be calling me maybe to see if I wanted to go into town, so I rang his cellphone, but when he didn’t answer, I figured it couldn’t have been him, so I rang my momma instead. (More Fun)

She was home this time, so we had a chat. She’d recieved and appreciated my pressie, especially Anji’s breasts (see earlier entry for details). So we nattered away for a while, running up my flat’s phonebill, but I guess I’ll be paying THAT as well as everything else too, goddam it. While I was sitting there catching up on Welly gossip (apparently, they think they can fix my desk chair – YAY says my back) my cellphone rang, so I answered it and it disconnected. Bizzare. However, the great thing about my beautiful Phillips Diga is Caller ID which means TREMENDOUS fun with phones. So once I got off the phone with Momma, I set out to discover who it was that was stalking me.

I rang back the number, and got the Auckland University Students Association Office answering machine. Well, I know I don’t know anyone there, unless I’ve all of a sudden been elected president of a school I don’t even go to, so I had to use my amazing powers of deduction, and figured out that atmos.net was having meetings there today. So I rang Matt back on his cellphone and yelled at him “ARE YOU STALKING ME?”. Hahahahahaha turns out he wasn’t. Still, it was fun to accuse. Roll on the next suspect.

Dee rang me, and came over a little while later. She loved my house, which made me feel warm fuzzies, cos I love it too. It’s so MINE, which is the best thing about it. Like, I can see myself living here for years (sure, and now I’ve said that I’ll probably be forced to move out or something). I guess that’s the good thing about being here alone all the time is that it really gives me a chance to bond with the house. I can’t believe I was so scared that I cried the first night I was here. I guess that’s mostly because there was no power that night, and I was expecting a thousand dodgy people to come a-thumping, when only one of them did really. But moving right along. So yeah, Dee and I gossiped, and caught up and choice stuff like that. She’s always really busy cos she works at Orbit, the resturant at the top of the Sky Tower, but I’ll see more of her once tech starts – especially since we live so close now.

Once she’d gone, I went online to geek a little bit. I was very keen to find out who my stalker was, so I was telling everyone #left right and centre about it. I was talking to Kini (who, incidently, wrote in her journal that she never used to like my journal but now she does, because apparently my writing style has changed – your thoughts on this please) and she was like “did you like my message?”. I thought she was referring to the 8 ICQ messages she’d sent me when I was but NO! Turns out SHE was behind my textmessage on my cellphone. I told Simon about it, and he was like “but doesn’t that cost heaps, to call from Australia?” I was like “well I guess she just thinks I’m worth it then!”. Of course, it turns out that it’s actually free and reaaaaaally easy to do. I’m not going to tell y’all here how, although I may well some other day, when I decide I want more random stalkers, but I posted it to the Vision list. Kini just knows her shit, bro!

I was watching “The Craft” tonight (God, why did I miss John Hannah for that piece of shit?) when I got another textmessage pagey thing. Awwww I so wish I COULD come to your flatwarming, Jo! It was so cool to hear from you!

Now I feel like the sister in ‘Leave Before You Go” doing her sneaky tshirt thing except she made her bit up, and I didn’t. Go read the book if you don’t understand. It’s by Emily Perkins and it rocks.

Um that’s about it, eh. I’m paging people like mad now. Gimme your cellphone numbers if you’re on Vodaphone:

Name:

Number:

And I’ve only just clicked to the “showers” bit now. hahahahahaha.

Monday 1; Febuary, 1999
Make Out Monday. God bless TV4 Marketing.

Kate and Theresa woke me up asking for towels, which I guess was better than them asking for tshirts to sleep in before then coming back and going “Can we have some boxer shorts too please? Both Kate and I are wearing G-strings and it’s not a pretty sight”. Then I went back to sleep until like 1.30pm.

Later I discovered a message from Anji on the answerphone, so I rang her back on my cellphone so as to not run up unexpected bills later. We gossiped for about 15 minutes, her telling me crazy stories and me trying to do the same. So that was choice. She apologised for panicking me out when Karen went into hospital.

Kate rang to tell me that they’d found a flat, and that her and Theresa would be around at 8pm with more alcohol to CELEBRATE this time. I had nothing else to do, so I just bummed around all day. Then I watched lots of TV, including “Favourite Moments of 90210″. Man, that all went downhill when Brenda left. I mean, I love Valerie and all, but it’s just not the same.

Anyways, Kate and Theresa showed up like an hour and a half late with their friend Marissa, and two casks of white wine. We heated up the leftover pizza in our scarily unclean oven, and sat out on the patio, them smoking up a storm. White wine and I don’t get along too well, so I didn’t guzzle quite as fast as the rest of them.

Monday 25; January, 1999

Yay, I had a stalker today. Right before Shortland Street, someone rang my cellphone three times. I could hear what I think was a female breathing in the background. Rock on. So that was amusing. Maybe that’s because I put my number in my ICQ information. Oh well, let’s tempt fate. 021 21 27 920. Sorry, I don’t know how to call that from overseas.

Mum had to ring me on it, cos Si was on the net all day. (Well, I was too – but not for as long cos I had to clean and cook and stuff – oh, is that backstabbing? Sorry, I don’t really mean it). Annnnnnyways, so here’s the deal with Karen – and thanks to all of you who have asked and sent well wishes and shit.

She took two days off work last week because she felt sick, and on the third day she went to the doctor, which is something she hardly ever does, and he told her to go straight to hospital cos she was running a fever, and there’s something wrong with her ankle. Apparently her blood is doing something wrong, related to her liver failure and CF. She’s going to be in hospital until like Wednesday, but probably won’t be able to go back to work for a long time, because obviously she can’t stand on her ankle. So yeah. I guess Mum probably doesn’t know the whole story, because Karen’s pretty secretive, but she seems to think Karen’s okay – just bored. So I guess that’s a relief. I still wish I was in Wellington.

Our bath curtain has fishes printed on it, and it smells like new PVC. Mmmmm. I pretty much gave up on the bathroom today. It’s superficially clean anyways.

I so need a job. I was going to ring up about telemarketing, but yeah – the phone line was in use. Besides, it’ll probably be like a long way away, and I haven’t got a car and all that funky shit. Simon’s thinking about going to Wellington like the day after tommorrow, which’ll leave me all alone and like, semi-frightened. Oh, and then Layton will move in, and that’ll be stink – having to talk to someone I don’t think I have much in common with. But hey, I might be pleasantly suprised. Hopefully. Or I’ll find friends. Or I’ll get stalked and murdered – which’ll at least make a good story for the journal.

Yay. ‘The future stretches ahead of me like a black highway”. Okay, that’s not an exact quote, but DAMN T2 was a great movie.

xioxoxox