Hubris.co.nz

Monday April 9th, 2001

My ISP is being a gimp. Gimp isp, gimp! I reckon Lou’s bosses should ensure that she has dsl at home, but apparently they have other priorities. Sheesh!

Today was all about working very hard scripting. That’s not computer scripting, oh no. Well, it kinda was, cos I had to format my CBT script so that it’ll work properly in Scala. Scala is dumb.

I listened to “My Body the Handgrenade” at work today, which is like a collection of b-sides and rarities by Hole, and it made so much more sense now after that biography of Courtney Love that I read. Listening to it, I felt like the BDO 99 was just yesterday, that somehow I managed to skip the past two years, which wouldn’t necessarily be such a bad thing, although I wouldn’t be who I am today. I feel very old – “Smells Like Teen Spirit” which is unquestionable the most important song to people in my generation came out TEN YEARS ago. TEN! Wow.

I’ve made an appointment to go and see Dr. White tomorrow and get my smear, and get a full STD screen (I don’t think I have anything, I just want to be 100% certain) and talk to her about my nutrition and stuff. Fun fun. Also today I’ve been coughing a dry shallow pathetic cough, so maybe she can see to that too.

Last night I traumatised Leigh by pasting bits out of a story I wrote when I was 15 to him – “Angela felt his hands slide up and down her back. She had to clutch at his shoulders, thinking of a line from Gone With the Wind – “Now I know why men put their arms around a woman when they kiss them; it’s so they don’t faint”. She was walking on air.” True story too. I just wrote it in the third person to get a new perspective, according to my diary at the time. Though what wisdom I’d learn from “Angela was leaning on him more and more. Then he spoke. “We’re lying on a flower pot,” he said regretfully” is beyond me. Still, five years from now, I’ll probably look back on what I’m writing these days and scoff.

Oh for fucks sake, how hard is it to get a line into the Net???

I feel good today because I just had a really nice long bath. I put my legs up in the air and fully submerged my head. I love the sound of being underwater. I also feel good cos I told Clay and Louise that I wanted to do separate food from them (and phrased it a little more diplomatically than “I’m tired of subsidising your animal products and your girlfriend”)

OH! I also got a pay cheque today, and that was very very nice.

AND! I was in Mt Eden for lunch, and I walked past one place after inspecting the menu, and this guy came out, and he was like “don’t you strut away from me” and I was thinking “sheesh, overboard waiter!” but it was my friend Derek, who I haven’t seen in like a year, so that was very cool. He was like “wow girl, look at you – whatever happened to the flower skirts?” which made me blush and smile. He’s doing advertising with Kate B this year, which means I can get her to slip him notes. Wahoo. And then when I was eating my lunch which was Malaysian noodles, Kate M rang me on my cellularmaphone and said she was in Mt Eden also, so we met up. She was a little scared and felt like she didn’t know what she was doing – I tried pointing out many times that it was only her first day.

The company I work for shouted morning tea for all 400 of us on campus today for going 100 days without an accident.

you see, the ting is…

This page is supposed to look kinda like my sari, but it doesn’t really. I can’t do it justice. It is so so fucking cool. I love it big lots. Even if it is a pain to wear.

Oh, do you know what else I love? Peter! Or um, more specifically, the fact that he gave me the Macy Gray cd.

I got so many cool pressies today, I’m just so completely spoiled, and it’s great. I’ve had such a fully primo day. Yes indeedy. My feet ache like motherfuckers though from dancing.

Shirley’s party was soooo choice, apart from the facthtat I had to keep running off to the bathroom to retie my sari cos layers of it were drooping. Oh the things we do to look so damn good.

I made my speech, and everyone laughed at all the right times, and everyone said ti was really good, so that made me happy. I felt bad cos no one made a speech for Evelyn, but what could I do? I don’t really know her.

Shirley was looking very very good in a tight skirt and bodice. We were all stunned. Sacha had to ask which one was Shirley, because she looked more like Evelyn.

Oh oh, I talked to Bourke! I was so stoked, cos he completely remembered me, although it’s been like two years. We were talking for ages, just instantly clicking again. I could see Maree and Kate M in a corner, and I KNEW they were going “Jo’s SO in” and I just felt bad, because I wasn’t. Sigh. Why do boys have to like boys? Why can’t they just like, snog and stuff for show, but really prefer girls? I think that’s a brilliant idea. I laughed when I saw Shirley talking to Kate M and Maree explaining. But he gladhanded me later, and gave me the sauciest wink. Cock tease!

When I first met Bourke, I thought he was an absolute god – he’s Dutch for gods sakes! So I went to a party with him and Shirley once, and I told Shirley I wanted him, and she was like “go for it, go on! I’m sure he’d be keen”. And of course, he chose that night to come out to her! D’oh! And of course, what made it worse was that she still told him I wanted him, and he was like “I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry” and I was like “don’t apologise silly”. And then he was like teasing me going “can you convert me?” and he was all close and stuff, and of course, Shirley was like “OI!” Well, it made for an interesting story, anyways!

I’ve decided that Derek is the closest thing to Robbie Williams I will ever get. Sigh. He’s still very entertaining though, just too short.

What else? Dancing was lots and lots of fun, apart from the slipping sari. Andrew was talking to me, and he goes “your hair looks really cool” and I was like “are you mocking me?” cos Brad and Maree have been hassling me for ages going “your hair is choice” ala Ben, but no, apparently Andy was genuine, and I think I slightly offended him, poor lad. Trudie and Dee gave me a “grow your own crystal” set. I got all these sciency gifts, it’s odd. Cool though.

Maree and I got a taxi home together, and the driver was Indian. We were chatting, and he was like “that’s crazy, what you are wearing” so I was like “pardon? you mean my skirt?” and he was like “yeah, what do you call it?”. I said it was a sari, but I was wearing it like a skirt because I didn’t know the traditional way to wear it, and I just loved the colours. He agreed that they were spectacular, adn when I added that Maree had given it to me, he had to agree.

Fuck this cd rocks. I need new music, all my old stuff is too associated now. Actually, I’m doing pretty well with Travis, cos there’s only like one line in the whole album that makes me think of stuff (“all I wanted is a chance to say I would like to see you in the morning – rolling over just to have you there will make it easy for a little bit longer”), so that’s nifty AND they’re playing here in July, Wahoo!

So yeah, stuff si all good, apart from the fact that I’m up at 2.30am and I’m still not packed. Dammit, i suck. Must… go… to…bed…must…get…up…in…seven..hours

Oh yeah, clayton and brad gave me these:

My boys rock

Bye bye, see youse guys in like 2 weeks or somefink.

Thursday 14; January, 1999

Oh yeah, last night Si, Si’s mommy and I went for dinner in Parnell. We were walking down the road when all of a sudden someone streaked out of a cafe, ran up to me and hugged me before I knew what was happening. It was Derek – YAY! So we had a chat, and I was really thrilled to learn that he is coming back to AIT this year after all. Faaaaaaaantastic. And so is Trudie. Now all we need is Tasha and Rochelle to come back too and we’ll be sweetassbro.

The cafe we went to was really really crap, but Simon’s momma paid so I guess I shouldn’t complain. Anyways, back to Thursday.

Ummm we went to town and sorted out Bank Stuff, then we went to Victoria Park Markets which SUCK, then met my parents at my storage unit in Three Kings to help them unload all my stuff. I’m so going to hire a moving truck to move it all into our flat. Fucked if I can be bothered carrying all those boxes!

So yeah, Thursday was really boring. OOooh wait, I saw Tom Larkin walking past back at the motel, so I realised that Shihad were staying there too. They were in a unit across the courtyard from us. Si kept going to check his washing so that he could walk past them. Mmmmmm Jon Toogood. And apparently another welly band – probably the Hasselhoff Experiance were staying there too. They were noisy waaaaaay into the night. We talked about going over and being groupies, but then I chickened out. Probably if Jo had been there I woulda gone.