Hubris.co.nz

On Friday, I made hte long drive up to Paraparaumu to see Oma. Pretty much as soon as I got there she said “You look fatter than when I last saw you! Have you put on weight?” Thanks Oma. And she kept reiterating it all through lunch, while trying to get me to have seconds. Hmmm. But it was still kinda cool. We talked about opera and April Fools and other stuff, as you do. After an hour and a half, I figured that was enough so I went home.

In the evening i made blackbean eggplant stirfry and there were lots of txts and phonecalls to coordinate our activities. Eventually Anji and I headed over to Ayna’s to listen to play records and chill before going out (just to be different). Charlotte and Alex came over, and so that was excellent because they’re both absolutely lovely. Charlotte used to flat with Bopa in Welly and she said that Bopa is mellow and tidy, which is very good news. And Alex is just a total sweetheart. Fatty showed p too, and him Anji and I headed down to Sub9 for DJ Zinc. The others were gonna follow us later.

Half a green alligator later, it was all excellent. When we started dancing, the dancefloor was empty, so it was really interesting to see what Sub9′s actual layout was like (“Oooh, so that’s where that hot chick snogged me before you scared her off at New Years, fatty!). and At first it was more cafe-ish music, and I wanted more “baaaaaaaaaaaaummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm” farting sorta bass, but it got there. I like dancing! Dancing number one excellent fun. I wish I could dance like the people who move their feet around lots and lots and lots though. I like watching people in Wellington dance. Si being the dear sweet boy that he is kept coming up to me to run his fingers up my neck and along my shoulders and up and down my back to make me giggle in pleasure. Tehehe, I like people touching me like that in those circumstances. Strangely enough though, he ran away when I told him that he was making my nipples errect. Dance dance dance. There was a pretty green laser shooting at the floor near me opening up portals when it wasn’t being a cloverleaf. However, at one stage, I had a freakout, cos the people were all too close and it was hot and well, you know how claustraphobic I get when people are bumping me so Anji and I went outside for a bit to chill.

When we went back in, we decided to dance in the bit between the door and the main dancefloor, which was completely empty so there was lots and lots and lots of room to go crazy in, so we did. It was funnn. I like dancing like a mad dancing thing. So we danced and danced and danced and danced. And danced. Etc. Etc. Eventually I went to the bathroom and it felt so weird to be walking that I was almost convinced that my feet were floating. My stomach started to complain after a second red bull and my temple hurt and both Anji and I were weary so we agreed that we’d had an excellent night and that we should end it on an up note, and so we left. We gave the taxi driver directions in stereo and he laughed at us. Whilst walking up the hill, I realised that it was raining adn that the rain felt absolutely lovely on my skin, little kisses from angels all over me so I stood in it for a very long time, while Anji laughed at me from the inside. In the lounge, Xmas lights were turned on and m2, and she rolled a wooden massager all over me and I was very very blissful. Then she gave me a valium and so I took a shower and had lovely lovely sleep.

Today I had coffee with Hulita at Olive which was cool, cos their cappachinos are the best in the entire country, and it was of course wonderful to see her again. Then I went home and went back to bed, because i was more than a little tired from the previous night. In the evening me and Mum&Neil went over to the Bentons’ for dinner. KateB and I giggled together lots, as we do, and our new cussword is “Bunny Rabbits” in any form or variation. We also had a big big arguement about exploitation with her dad which is too hard to explain here, but basically involves a British movie star currently featuring in a movie that’s fairly significant movie to NZ, and a boy we went to high school with. And we played Balderdash, good wholesoem fun, and I won. ANd now I am super tired so I will go read more ‘Survivor and go to bed, probably.

So, I haven’t actually finished writing my speech yet (and I have to do it tomorrow!) but I don’t really have any doubt in my ability to talk my way out of my own ass (ha, how’s taht for taking a couple’o cliches and muddling them up?) so I’m sure it’ll be fine if I take a little break and wait for this mask to set on my face and write my journal. Woah, that was quite a long sentence just there.

Today Maz came and talked to us in our PR Forum and at the end she came over to me and said “I’ll call you later” and it was so her attempt at being Carolyn Ryan saying hi to Nigel when she lectured us in Journalism second year (inncidently, why do all guys think she is the hottest news reader in the world?). After my lecture I tried to play some kinda weirdass Simon Says game in the quad but only so I could get a free LiftPlus. Students are such whores for free shit, even if it tastes nasty. Another lecture and then i went home and got stuck in on my speech again, until I got distracted by a nap.

My shoes from Willow Shoes got delivered today, yay! They’re the burgandy Mary Janes taht you will find on page three of that site if you’re really into stalking me that much. They’re lovely, and so are the people at Willow Shoes, who sent me a bath bomb as a free gift, and then wrote to me to tell me that my thank-you email had made their day. Awww. People who supply me size 11 shoes deserve all the love in the world. Yesterday I got a pair of new jeans, and they’re flared and soft and lovely, but maybe I should have got them in a size smaller because they sit reaaaaal low and they’re not supposed to. It’s weird, when I put on clothes that i haven’t worn in ages, they’re all looser too, which would suggest that maybe I’ve lost weight, but I look a whole lot fatter, and my skin is bursting with ugly pustuales, and I’m just generally unattractive right now and meh. My hair is looking good though! I did find it amusing that only KateM noticed i’d had it dyed.

My face isn’t quite ready to peel off yet though, so I will hold off on my Patrick Bateman imitations. My mummy is coming up to Auckland for a Potter’s Convention over easter, so I’ll drive back to Welly with her and her friend Paul and stay down there for a week. This means that I’ll get to go out with Ayna and Daniel et all, and hopefully get a chance to catch up with Fatty, who I haven’t heard from in a million years. You suck, Fatty. And KateB too, hopefully, unless she’s back by then, and she’ll say to me “have you lost weight?” and make me feel happy. And Tom too hopefully. I’m looking forward to the holidays, even if before then I have this 20% speech, and a 10% Com Strat, and then oh yeah, there’s that 50% IMC essay due next wednesday which I can’t yet even understand the question of. Guess who will be spending the day in Borders on Thursday buried in the Marketing section? I figure it’s only fair to use it as a library since it’s an evil empire and everything.

Why is hotmail so fucking slow tonight? Of course, i just realised that zFree is ending its service at the end of April so I’m going to have to actually pay for an ISP which means that I’ll be able to use a mailprogramme again, yay. Damn webbased mail, nothing but trouble! I saw my landlady today and she said that my room would definately be carpeted by the end of March, she was just waiting for the carpet people to come in to do one fo the apartments on the ground floor. She’s renovating the apartment of the motorcycle man who was killed in an accident. Last night I moved the dining room table into my room so that I have a proper working surface – you will of course remember that my desk is very dodgylike, and unlikely to survive an assembly then disassembly whilst the carpet is being laid. Of course, this does bring up the issue that when I have carpet again, I will no longer have any excuse not to put my bed back together. I don’t think I want to though! Having my mattress directly on the floor is really comfortable, and as anyone who’s ever even sat on my bed can attest to, it’s damn noisy. Squeak squeak squeak. Then again, since I have to put up with Kara’s MOTHERFUCKING GIGGLING all the time, so what if Clay has to hear my bed moving around, even if I’m just sleeping in it by myself very innocently? And I don’t care if I piss Ben off, because fuck, he’s pissing both me and Clay off more and more on a daily basis. I bumped into Bopa the other day, one of the lovely girls that I met on Boxing Day, and she’s living up here now and is unhappy with her flat. Clay’s friend Adrian is also thinking about finding a new flat, so Ben had better pull his socks the fuck up, that’s all I can say. Well no, that’s not all I can say. KateH offered to make me labels to stick on all my food to try and get him to stop eating it, so yes please dear,if you have time!

Maaaaaargh, I must take a break from my computer. Hurry up and call me, dick.

Okay, so I thought I knew passion and lust before, but oh I was so so wrong. I saw “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” today, and oh my god gaaaaaaaaah I am so in love with Chang Chen. See the movie and you’ll see what I mean. He was the bandit, with the wild hair and cheekbones you could cut yourself on, eyes smouldering with passion, lean bodied, and oh the passion between him and Jen! Sorry, excuse me while I just drown in my own juices. I want him, I want him I want him I want him I want him I want him I want him.

I must go see the movie again. And you should too. Go to www.crouchingtiger.com to see tidbits of him. It was a brilliant brilliant film – amazing fights, amazing cinematography, a good storyline, and best of all the love and the passion between Jen and Lo and the parallel passion of the other two – wow.

That website lets you make your own trailers for it, so I made one, just using what I thought were the clips with Lo in them. The actual movie trailers are so so much better – and you might have already seen and drooled over them if you’ve been to the Deluxe Cinemas lately, or possibly the Rialto, but the clip I made can be seen here. And if that doesn’t work, sorry. But it was beautiful anyways. He’s a beautiful man – he can steal my comb then tie me up any day.

I wanna learn martial arts!

Yeah, so that was like, the highlight of my year I’d say. Heh. I smell like Midori now, but it’s not from drinking – it’s from Melon bubble bath that I got for Xmas. My parents are driving me a little mad, and there’s a suspicious bump on my neck (not to mention a three inch scratch from a finger nail across my belly) but that’s life innit? I was so happy to hear from Si that yes we can stay at his grandmother’s in Taupo I yelled out “Yes! Yes!” in the middle of Courtney Place.

I hope I have dreams about this movie tonight. Mmmmmmmmmmmm!

My eyes hurt, so I probably should go to bed sometime. I’m in Wellington. We have a massive looming Xmas tree and funny lights. There are big parcels for me under it which I have fondled and am still confused by. The house is all clean. It’s cool.

I had SUCH a nice drive down today, all lovely sunshine and little traffic. I sang and smiled, young, fabulous and free. I listened to Kiss FM for 2 hours whilst in the Taupo vicinity because Jarrod was dj’ing on it. Innnnnnteresting music selection going on there, Fur Patrol one minue and Meatloaf the next. Oh and speaking of Fur Patrol, how fucking cool is it that they’re the Xmas number one in NZ? So fucking cool. The Xmas number one in the UK is probably “Bob the Builder” which I heard on the simulcast of Top of the Pops somewhere in the Manawatu. Eminemem played “Stan” on Top of the Pops as well, but he was strangely cut off before the last two verses. What a suprise.

My father’s trying to tell me that Robbie Williams is gay. As if.

I got a text message today from an unknown number saying “Are your nipples errect?” . I was a little confused, but unsuprised. When I rang the number back, the answering machine said it was Kate, and later i talked to the Bentons to confirm that it was indeed Kate B. So I sent her back a message that said “yes and I’m all wet and ready for you”. She hasn’t replied.

My cat Pixie is sitting on top of the largest present for me. It’s a bigass box, but I bet it’s just a cd with a lot of newspaper around it. I love Xmas pressies. I have to go shopping tomorrow though, which will be a mare.

Simon’s not answering his phone. We still have nowhere to stay in Taupo. No room at the Inn. I guess I’ll just give birth in a manger instead. Hayley never knows who I am when I phone her. Brad rang me today to ask where the axe is. He also emailed me some addresses for home&away related sites. I like this one – http://www.alfstewart.cjb.net/. Stone the flamin’ crows, Ails, you build a website and then those bloody yahoos come in with their caps on backwards and just smash the place up.

My belly hurts too. I should go, although it’s been great having a yarn with you. Oh wait hang on, what are you getting me for Xmas? This is what I would like:

• A nokia 3210/3310
• Bed linen! Queen size duvet covers, and make sure they’re pretty
• Makeup – ‘Juliet’ coloured Poppy eyeshadow, or anything Napolean, or any kinda lip gloss at all
• Money or vouchers
• CDs: ‘Kid A’ Radiohead, ‘Pet’ Fur Patrol or ‘The Altruist’ (or is it ‘Altruism’?) DLT.
• Lamps, pillows and candles (I wanna live in a harem)
• Alcohmahol or illict substances
• Art works – not movie posters
• Handbags (cos you can never have enough)
• a digital camera
• a cd burner
• a trip to Melbourne/Sydney

Thank you. I will give you my postal address on request. Oh and one last thing – my sister Karen wrote this tonight.

Me (in bear mask)”roaaaaar!” Kara: “eeek!” Me:”Sorry, I didn’t mean to score you. I mean, scare you”

Hi kids! It’s been ages, hasn’t it? Well I’ve kinda sorted out my Hubris hassles, and we’re back, smaller than ever! I moved my cam directory to Annette’s ihug space, and 1998 and 1999 are now on woos.org, so it’s all good. I’ll put the links on ummm my 404 page possibly, so look there if you can’t find what you’re after.

So, what have I been up to this past week or so? Well since I wasn’t able to access Hubris, I wrote this and this on Swinney.org. I like places that let you in without a dress code. I’ve also worked damn hard suprisingly this week. I joined the Freemasons. But you read that on Swinney. I got my first ever four digit pay cheque, yay me. Of course, most of that will go to Entertainz and my car insurance and water bills and phone bills and my parents and paying off my bank overdraft, but still, I’m super excited.

We still haven’t found a place to stay in Taupo yet, and still I’m constantly inviting more friends to come along. I think we’re up to a group of 10 probably. We wanted to stay with Jarrod, but it seems too many people are coming up from Welly to stay with him already. Saint Pats boys!!!! Muhahahah.

I’m currently trading emails with one of the guys that I rang off Penny’s cellphone last friday whilst very drunk and making random calls. Apparently i told him we were meant to be together, based on his last name, which I remember, and I advised him never to get married, which i don’t remember. You can say a lot in voicemail, I guess. I got the photos from that night back, but I might scan them in welly, cos I can’t be assed doing it right now. I’ve done too much graphical stuff already. We’re making tapes for Friends of Garland as Xmas pressies, and I was responsible for the exceedingly stylish cover design. I’m also the one dubbing the tapes at high speed (I need a cd burner) and singing along at matching high speeds. It’s very scary, I tell you. Alvin Simon Theodore. Do do do do do do. Where’s the xentertainment article on THEM eh?

We had Garland Xmas Dinner tonight, although Jeremy’s already in Dunedin. I made fettucine with Chicken, sundried tomato, olives, walnuts and a blue brie and white wine sauce. It was yuuuuummy. For dessert we had toffee ice cream, strawberries and chocolate vodka. I haven’t had chocolate vodka in waaay too long, but as Bradley brought me back a bottle of Absolut from Australia, it was possible, bless him. I love my flatmates so so much, I almost shed a tear after dinner when we were exchanging Xmas gifts. They’re my best friends and my lifeblood. Plus they gave me a Bear Mask for xmas! And some noodle bowls. Clay and I got Brad an excellent book on Bears, and I got Clay an under $15 Wine Guide. Brad got Clay a pokemon watch.

There’s just something very very wrong about a guy giving his girlfriend flavoured condoms for Xmas – i mean why not just give her a tool kit or a bowling ball and be done with it? Really, who’s going to gain the maximum benefit out of that gift after all?

The other day – well, Wednesday to be exact, after work and a cold shower for me (long hot sweaty drive home) Brad and I went up to investigate our new Local, which used to be a restaurant called Forte, and before that a restaurant called Amadeus. It still has an odd man standing outside it, but it’s now a pub called “The Horse and Jockey” which is appropriate given its proximety to the Ellerslie Race Course. I bought him a pint. He bought me a pint. It was still too hot to bother walking home so I bullied him into a third (“what do you have to get up for tomorrow? what do you have to do with your life anyways?”) and after that the fourth one came easy. When we finally made it home (it’s my New Years Resolution to become a Regular, and recognize other patrons and make jokes with the staff in some establishment, so it may as well be that one) we watched “Young Americans” which I’d taped last week and saved to watch with Brad when he got back from Australia. It’s a Dawson’s tie-in because one of the main characters was Pacey’s friend in two episodes, but it’s by no means at the same level. I know it took me a while to get fully into Dawsons, but this show’s apparently only got eight episodes made. Ahh well.

On Sunday night I went to Helen’s house for dinner. I am at one with the shore. There was petanque and badminton on the lawn. It was very choice even though I got eaten alive by mosquitos. I talked to PR girls who were all seemingly jealous that I have a PR job now despite doing Multimedia. I like my job, even though I occasionally have too much free time on my hands and my dad doesn’t always email me back when I want him too.

I applied for another job the other day (remember I’m only on a short project contract) but I was talking to the woman at the recruitment agency after I sent in my CV, and she basically said that I was too good for the job and would end up being bored silly. Nice. But she’s putting me on the books incase anything better comes up. I was talking to Lola this morning, because there was a bad article published in one of the local papers that was related to what we are doing, and she said we might have to change course with our project. I asked if I’d still have a job then, and she pointed out that I’m contracted until the 28th of February, and they’d have to find something for me to do. Yay, I’ve loved it so far. I mean how many other girls get to go into Freemason temples? And the whole car access is choice. I admit, I kinda semi plan my meetings to fall between 10-11am cos that’s my favourite hour on the radio. But I have the freedom to do that. Edina and Lola both think I’m doing really good work, so wahoo.

But i have two weeks holiday now so hopefulyl I won’t talk about work too much. There was a semi xmas party this morning. Well, the Communications Department, which I am a part of although I physically work in another area, and am involved only in communications for that other area, had breakfast out today, but I got to work too late, and Lola was already gone by the time I got there, and although I knew where they were, I felt too dumb to go along. And then the division I’m in had drinks after 11am. Of course, because I’d missed out on breakfast, I had a couple of sips of bubbly and felt all funny, so I had to leave (despite how unfascinating the people in my workspace are!) and eat something at a nearby cafe.

I really am rambling now eh. You know, I wasn’t too distraught when I couldn’t get into Hubris. I wasn’t even that distraught when I couldn’t get into Email.com. I guess it’s all a matter of priorities. But don’t worry – there’s no way I’m giving up this web site. No indeed!

Don’t forget in/out for like, other info.

xoxo

Me (in bear mask)”roaaaaar!” Kara: “eeek!” Me:”Sorry, I didn’t mean to score you. I mean, scare you”

So I’ve been online for like 30 minutes and I still haven’t managed to read a single one of my emails yet. I really must change email accounts.

I bought two heads of brocoli today at 15 cents a head each. This is a good thing. I got them in Northcote, if you’re interested. Today again I was driving around the Shore investigating venues. It’s great. I like Rob in the car division – he gave me a manual drive car today when I told him about the stupid things I did with the automatic last week (I was wondering why the car braked so damn jerky when I was being super gentle until I realised that I was using my left foot on the brake, which as we all know is wrong). There’s a couple’o pajs parked down in amongst the company car pool too – I’ve promised Brad and Clay I’m going to try my hardest to get to take a paj out for the day and I’ll come and pick them up and we’ll drive through Remmers darling. Anyways. So yeah, Northcote/Birkenhead in the morning, then Devenport and Albany in the afternoon.

I had a meeting with the PR Consultant lady I’m working with who’s only in 2 days a week and gave my report and she said I was going well, and that I have full authority to go ahead and book the venues and start drawing up a timetable. Scaaary! I’d much rather someone was checking me every step of the way, but I just don’t have that at work – they leave me up to my own devices. I’m very good at looking busy. I have email at work now, finally my own key and login, but so far I’ve only given my email address to essential contacts (read: Kini and Olivia). I’m trying to be good. I don’t want to fuck this all up. I’m alredy worried about finding a job in February, because I know I have a tendancy not to be very good at seeking things out because basically everything i ever need falls in my lap. Except for my paycheque – grrr! I don’t get paid for a fortnight, and I’m in malls and shopping areas for half the morning – all my xmas shopping could be done by now if I had a cent left in the bank. Ahh well. Tomorrow I’m going to be in a working party conference anyways. Have I mentioned that I get business cards?

Wank wank wank wank wank. I actually am often left without anything to do, so I call Shirley, and since I’m in an open planned office, the people around me would hear
“Hi, it’s Joanna here from *, is that you Shirley? How are you?…….. Right, I’m calling in regards to the communication briefing I received the other day……….. No no, that’s fine……..yes I was in contact yesterday but we decided to not pursue that avenue any further for a while…. yes of course it’s re-occuring….I appreciate that…. absolutely, I’ll just make a note of that…….. yes…. yes….. well would you have some time free for a meeting?…….. how’s today for you?…..alright well we’ll scheduale something for next week then” and then my boss will come back and I’ll want to ask her something so I’ll hang up on Shirley really abruptly going “Great, well thank you very much for your time”. I’m SO a kid in heels and pearls. Nevermind the fact that the rest of the office spends their lives on the phone having really boring conversations with their car insurance and real estate agent places that I can’t help but evesdrop on. Or maybe they’re all speaking in a secret code too. Hmmmmmmm, intriguing!

Because I spent so much time driving today, I came up with a list of memorable car moments that I jotted down because I was bored. You know how I like my lists. Sheesh, anyone would think that I was incapable of stringing together anything more cohesive. And ha! I’m going to alphabetize them by the first letter in the sentence:

• A memory from Primary School; the greatest day of my life ever at that stage was when I got to sit squashed up next to my Crush – Andrew Carnegie – to and from a netball tournament
• Amy and Andee taking me over the harbour bridge by mistake, playing the Spice Girls and bumping the car to cheer me up
• Anji and Greg taking me up to Auckland for Pearl Jam when I was 14, determined to corrupt me and we picked up a dumb hitchhiker who said “Youse guys”
• Countless Welly/Auck drives with Kate B, listening to Cat Stevens, blowing bubbles and taking mad photos left right and centre
• Driving myself to Wellington thinking so hard that later I wrote a 7 page essay on the appropriate course of action to take as a consequence of that thought process
• Driving to Welly with Simon and Matt Sawkill in the backseat, me giggling away to myself like the cat that’s got the cream and is mixing its metaphors like a DJ with religion.
• Going to Waiuku for Kate H’s goodbye party, Justin putting the car in neutral going down a hill and it kept going, freefalling
• Kim speeding along Greenlane West at 3am in the fog when we were on a mad sugar rush and couldn’t see 10 feet ahead of us
• Kini in my rear view mirror, the magical drive into the Coramandel
• MM in the MR2, subwoofer under my seat, lost in Remuera at 4am trying to find food cos we’d been up arguing all night
• Pajero pulling up outside my house in Mount Roskill, Shirley and Dee Cavalry coming to be with me when I found out that Opa died
• Pixie’s friend Sam’s orange pumpkin car, tinnie house in Te Atatu right next to a primary school and I thought we’d be beaten up by protective westie parents
• Roadtripping to Waihi with Shirley, her doing crazy overtaking manouvers and making Trudie scream when I dared her to drive down a bank
• Sung Song association all the way to St. Heliers with Brad in the stereoless Grey Ghost
• the other night in Jeremy’s car, cold from swimming, falling asleep on Clayton’s shoulder

I warned you that i have full stationary cupboard rights – notepads are perfect for lists.

“I think you’re crazy, maybe, I think you’re crazy.”

We;re in some bar douwn int he viaduct and there’s me making oi5rgasm noises not that I’d really know what ythey were because Briamn Molko is on the buig screen they were playing KJuice tv and oh my god how much do my panties melt at the site of him? Change your taste in men.

Boy I met last nightwas very very hot and then he said those goddam magic words “back when I was depressed” and I was like noooo I want so meone different. But hge aws still sexy, I imagine I will go stalk marbecks now. Thast qwas at dinner last night some thai place the Green Elephant w e went there for our big night out i remembre. But today is today and not then becuase yeah then was all differenyt and my toenail wasn’t broken then, and goddam I miss being in love but hey yeah ajnyways, stuff is fine this way I think and was I too obvious? I think not.

Ohb my god bbay it’s 3am i must be lonely oh fuck off maqtchbox 20, I am so un eloquent really but you are stil l reading me anyways. Clayton’s 212st was tonight,. I had soooo much fin. fuin. fun. IO was all grumpy and shit before hand. Ckay took my car. XClay took my stereo. I got basil garlic aioli all over my thai silk skiryt opn the way in and setting up. But I k nkiocked back a qwhole shitload of red whine. I HATE cklay’s relies. What a pack of bossy big dorks. wER HAD everythingm all set up and shit at the movie theatre he’d hired and they came and moved it all around. No wonder he’s so fucking pussywhipped, it’s not my fault that I boss him around.

there was a disco ball and that was fun. I slaved all day making mushroom pies and quiches. No hesitation no delay you come omn just like special k. Just like I swallowed half my stash. Lots to drink. Stuff was cool. I hadn’t seen maree in so long. Or shirley neither. Kate Benton told me I was having a good tit day. Clayton agreed. It’s so this tshirt. I love my stativc shirt,. I like my trits too. Tits, not trits. Oh god, I’m hideous, I should just og to bed but like, I’m niot sleepy. so ui will ramble, and you will read it. Suckers. you’re all pussy whipped too. Okay and Kate came into my room this morning ior was it yesterady, and said I smelt all nice like sleep. What’s up witht that? Where the fuck am I? this is SUCH a bad narrative.

Okay yueah, so I was all grumpyu this afternoon, especially when kate rang me at 6pm wanting rescuingb and I had to hgo pick her up even whenb we were supposed to be leaving at 6.15. And then in the process of getting to the theatre, the garlic basil dip got all over my skirt and oh my god was I giving everyone evil looks over that fuck I’m cold.

Talk about guilty conscience, although technically I didn’t do anything wrong. IUnless you count pyutting a shaker in my bag, but I don’t count that. UIt was from thej viaduct after all. At the back of the theaterette were a row of couches, and clay reserved those for us flatties and our signigicicant others (ie Morrison and Kara). I was sharing a couch with kate and a bottle of red whine. When I was in the bathroom, maree was talking tol me althouhgj U dunno how she knew it was me, so she came up and sat with us. But then I went and was throwing aup and I think she disappearefd. Human Traffic was the movie – it looked amusing except the chick looked like Tamsin gfrom Shortkland Street whicjh was just disturbing.

And then somehow Iwas at deschlers how did that happen? I don’t remember, butthere was live drum and base and simon w as dancing and ti was very amusing and stuff an do h my god was I really oh dear I worry me sometimes, and I talked to clayt’s frienmd Adrian who’s noce buit shy and also clay’s friemnd lucy who is a drunken slapper and his “friends’ romy and emily were there – nice look black bra dna white singlet fucking drunken sluts and they even called themselves that.

descblers became some walk downtownh after some big housekey scandel and i guess kate b let justin in after all unless he cli,mbed in our window whicjh would be easyt . some place downtown, was it providence? some name like that. $20 shakers, clay stole 4 shot glasses, I goty the shaker unbeknown to either one of us where hase si gone?: kate m dreove yus home. Providence had juice pla7ying on the big screen, but a different soundtrack. And yeah, we came home, and I was being tacky. Kate M was like “you’re on fire, we could ask you anything now and you’d amswer right? ” but the thing is I would anyways. Brad’s on lunch tomorrow, I hope it’s good.

I feel like a skanky slapper right now Only I am so muchb etter dressed. And my hair is better. As the flat would tease me, my hair is choice. a dn my nipples are amazing. etc etc. QWhy is it htat I let myslef be hassled so mch? I qwill keep my mouth shut in the fututre. Unless of course, I am having littl e black babies. That’s the rule kate m set for me.

Thursday August 30th, 2000

I am so so so so so so wired right now, so excuse me if I babble. I haven’t slept in like 36 hours, except for a two hour nap last night. Last night I was up late “helping kate” with a website assignment she had (if she gets an A, which is fairly likely now, I get a half hour back massage, and a two course breakfast in bed). I went to bed before 3ish, but I have like a zillion things to do right now and so my mind decided to list and evaluate all those things instead of letting me go to sleep. And then I had to get up at 6.30, throw some clothes on and zoom out to Sky City, and PICK UP MY LITTLE BABY!!!! Yaaaaay Si’s in town. So that’s very very exciting. And Brad was just as excited when Si showed up in his bed – I didn’t tell the boys when Si was gonna get here, as I wanted to surprise them and we did.

I’d intended to go straight back to bed, but I was feeling all chipper and hyper on lack of sleep, so I made waffles instead. Clay had to go out, so Brad Si and I had a lovely breakfast together before Brad went off to tech. I felt like a good American sitcom Mom. I tried not to fall asleep in order to keep Si company, but then he went and slept anyways, so I did some work. Eventually I made Si get up so we could go to town together. We met up with Brad in the radio studio, and went to the Bakehouse Cafe for lunch. Then they made me go to my Instructional Design for Multimedia class, yawn. Peter Mansfield has progressed from calling me “Joanne” to calling me “Jo” now, and I’m not happy.

Si came to my MMbroadcasting class with me. It was so exciting, really it was. Ian logged us all onto some other server so that we could bypass the firewall to look at streaming media. Wahoo, what an experiance! Then we met up with Brad to give him a ride home, and as the motorway was blocked, we went via Newmarket and the Warehouse. Man I’ve missed Si’s momma’s warehouse card!

I spent the evening “helping kate” after dropping Si in town for some concert thingie. Then Clay came home, and I helped him put together party bags for his party. He bought $50 of pix’n mix candy. I imagine this is why I am feeling so wired. The bags are cool, man. There’s a dollar mix twist bag in each, and a hat, and a horn, and a milky bar, and it’s all stuck down with pokemon stickers. Clay’s so excited about his party, it’s so so cute. I just hope it all goes smoothly. Lollies lollies lollies. Kate came home and gave me a V, which I drank without thinking. Sugar sugar sugar sugar. I went and watched her play with makeup, and obsessed over my hair. I had bits of it twisted up while it was still wet today, so it ended up all wavy, like every single tv star has it this season. Then we waited around til like sometime past one am when Si finally texted me for a ride home. Kate drove, because we could both see how babbling and jumpy I was. In fact, I should be in bed now. More songs should use xylophones, I think.

Tom and I are going to get married on the 29th of February, but I’m not telling him which year it is. This way, every year he’ll be renting a powder blue tux and waiting by the phone. Brilliant.

It’s cold, but not as cold as it has been, and I’m feeling quite snug. I have also just finished my last assignment – designing a business card, advertisement and another cd cover. My ad was for a rave called “Olympia” and it featured a 3D logo typa thing. I made up dj names for it, so there was DJ Twin, cos I was talking to Shirley on the phone, Fork, Spook, and then I started looking around my desk for Molko, Bik, and Korma. Oh and Colour By Numbers, which was an allusion to the number thing I was reading Shirley at the time as well.

Why is it that whenever I’m brokest I go shopping? Maree and I went to St. Lukes today (I rang her – she was like “I was just about to call you, only I thought ‘no, must not call joanna, must study, must not call joanna’ “) so that we could find birthday presents for Shirley, but instead I found myself buying a pressie for Kini, because when I saw it I knew she had to have it, and I love her lots and stuff. And Maree convinced me I needed more foundation, and I DID need saline solution, and a budget hoodie, so I was well served. Except of course, for not getting Shirley a pressie. I will have to look again tomorrow. Oh, we also cut Maree a key, so now Kimmy Gibbler can come over whenever she wants. And she can house-sit for us.

Our ad in the Herald rang today, but only one guy rang about the flat, and he seemed put off by the fact that there’d be four of us in the house. Go figure. He sounded boring anyway. We still have ads up at uni and AUT, and will have a couple in the trade and exchange coming out on Monday, but it just seems like a lost cause really. I’m stressed, yes, but Brad is calm, and it’s him that’s going to be left here alone whilst Clay and I trot off on our holidays. Although of course, Maree will be around. She’s driving me mad lately calling me “cutie cutie cutie”. Apparently she thinks the number of guys that I have slept with is extremely cute. I’m not sure I agree with her, but I guess the fact that I’ve uncontrollably started sucking my thumb doesn’t help much either. Brad keeps on laughing at me for that too. And if Clayton was ever home, he probably would as well. Man, I’ve become such a target for ridicule! It’s just not fair!!!!!

Three more sleeps to go! I am very very excited, as you can imagine I would be. Our house is such a pigstye right now – I dont’ know whether I should clean it before I go or not. Brad reckons this is our equilibrium, half way between the mess of Simon, and the clean of Thomas. Gosh, I quote an awful lot of other people, don’t I? Oh yeah, I wanted to quote this too:

From: “Peter Mahoney”
Date: June 14, 2000 7:37:20 AM EDT
To: Joanna McLeod

“Peter and Kate M were discussing my journal tonight at the bar, cos they’re both sometimes readers. ”

Sometimes readers? I’m so desparate for human connection these days that I actually got on the net tonight *just* to see if you’d added anything new to your journal.

Heh. It’s always nice when there are people sadder than me. I still haven’t fixed my desk chair. I’ve stolen a dining room chair instead. Oh, remind me to ring Dr. White tomorrow and reassure her that I’m still alive. And I must ring Penny and invite her for saturday, and do some more laundry, and write a packing list. My life is very exciting, as you can see. Yaaaaaaaaaaaay I turned in my report on my cd rom today. Brad had lent me his laptop last night so I could work on it in the lurve tent. Damn I wanna laptop now. I felt so New Media. If only it was an ibook. Right, I’m just rambling now. I should stop. Okay.

Oooh I got my first birthday card yesterday, from Karen – it was one of those square cards that I really dig, and it had a picture of a girl on it, and the words “Drama Queen”. Bitch!

Sunday, June 11th, 2000

I’m really happy cos I finished my cd rom today, and it looks okay. I was dumb and forgot to bundle Quicktime with it, so I might have to go and burn a new copy, but I dunno if I can be assed. Guess what everyone’s getting for Xmas? Yes, that’s right. I already had everyone in the multimedia lab today singing “Stop” as I was digitizing my dancing Brad footage.

Then I came home, and I meant to study, but I had to talk on the phone to people, and then I took the paper back to bed cos it was so cold, and then I was warm so I couldn’t get up, and then I had to talk to Shirley for ages, and then I had to watch TV and then Maree came over.

We watched Return to Treasure Island which was very amusing, and then L.A. Confidential. We decided we’re going to invite Russell Crowe and Guy Pierce over to play. We’re happy to share, but I’m going to take Russell first, cos I feel like having a Man kinda Man. It was a really really good movie, even if we did have to go get Macdonalds in the middle of it. I ate like 8 mikan, but they just weren’t doing anything for me. Whoops, that’s mandarins, sorry.

Oh, oh, last night! Clayton’s girlfriend is absolutely lovely, we were very impressed. I’m sure she somehow let me win when we were playing “Agitation” just to get into the good books. I think she didn’t quite get me and Brad, but then again, no one really does. I remember complaining to Thomas once when he didn’t laugh at a joke of mine going “if BRAD was here, he’d laugh” and Thomas was like “Brad laughs at everything you say anyways” but it’s not just mindless laughter, I swear! We’re just on another level. If everyone else knew how to play Song Association, the whole world could laugh along too.

After dinner and lots and lots of wine, Brad and Kate M went off to his room, and Clay and Kara were going to watch a video, so I made Si come to my room to give the kids some privacy. He played on IRC, and I went to bed, quite tired, and quite drunk. I babbled dumbly for ages, but eventually I managed to shut up, and went straight to sleep after his ride came to get him.

Oh oh oh, I need a flatmate, still, really really badly. If everyone could maybe just email Maree and tell her to stop being Kimmy Gibbler and be Stephanie instead, that might help. (for those of you that don’t watch Full House, basically we all want her to stop being the crazy neighbour, and be an actual part of the family). Of course, this is emotional blackmail, which isn’t nice, so umm, sorry Maree. But you love us really.