Hubris.co.nz

Monday April 9th, 2001

My ISP is being a gimp. Gimp isp, gimp! I reckon Lou’s bosses should ensure that she has dsl at home, but apparently they have other priorities. Sheesh!

Today was all about working very hard scripting. That’s not computer scripting, oh no. Well, it kinda was, cos I had to format my CBT script so that it’ll work properly in Scala. Scala is dumb.

I listened to “My Body the Handgrenade” at work today, which is like a collection of b-sides and rarities by Hole, and it made so much more sense now after that biography of Courtney Love that I read. Listening to it, I felt like the BDO 99 was just yesterday, that somehow I managed to skip the past two years, which wouldn’t necessarily be such a bad thing, although I wouldn’t be who I am today. I feel very old – “Smells Like Teen Spirit” which is unquestionable the most important song to people in my generation came out TEN YEARS ago. TEN! Wow.

I’ve made an appointment to go and see Dr. White tomorrow and get my smear, and get a full STD screen (I don’t think I have anything, I just want to be 100% certain) and talk to her about my nutrition and stuff. Fun fun. Also today I’ve been coughing a dry shallow pathetic cough, so maybe she can see to that too.

Last night I traumatised Leigh by pasting bits out of a story I wrote when I was 15 to him – “Angela felt his hands slide up and down her back. She had to clutch at his shoulders, thinking of a line from Gone With the Wind – “Now I know why men put their arms around a woman when they kiss them; it’s so they don’t faint”. She was walking on air.” True story too. I just wrote it in the third person to get a new perspective, according to my diary at the time. Though what wisdom I’d learn from “Angela was leaning on him more and more. Then he spoke. “We’re lying on a flower pot,” he said regretfully” is beyond me. Still, five years from now, I’ll probably look back on what I’m writing these days and scoff.

Oh for fucks sake, how hard is it to get a line into the Net???

I feel good today because I just had a really nice long bath. I put my legs up in the air and fully submerged my head. I love the sound of being underwater. I also feel good cos I told Clay and Louise that I wanted to do separate food from them (and phrased it a little more diplomatically than “I’m tired of subsidising your animal products and your girlfriend”)

OH! I also got a pay cheque today, and that was very very nice.

AND! I was in Mt Eden for lunch, and I walked past one place after inspecting the menu, and this guy came out, and he was like “don’t you strut away from me” and I was thinking “sheesh, overboard waiter!” but it was my friend Derek, who I haven’t seen in like a year, so that was very cool. He was like “wow girl, look at you – whatever happened to the flower skirts?” which made me blush and smile. He’s doing advertising with Kate B this year, which means I can get her to slip him notes. Wahoo. And then when I was eating my lunch which was Malaysian noodles, Kate M rang me on my cellularmaphone and said she was in Mt Eden also, so we met up. She was a little scared and felt like she didn’t know what she was doing – I tried pointing out many times that it was only her first day.

The company I work for shouted morning tea for all 400 of us on campus today for going 100 days without an accident.

you see, the ting is…

Tuesday 16; February, 1999

Geri: “Boys, boys, boys – have you not heard of the word ‘compromisation’ ? ” (Spiceworld)

Okay, so that wasn’t actually said to me today, but I said it to Trudie for reasons that escape me. And I just love it. So yeah.

I got up at 7AM today – that’s like about three hours after I finally managed to sleep. Scary shit man – I so had to force myself to get up then cos I knew if I slept another 20 minutes I’d never get out. So yeah, I got my act together, to go into tech for Orientation. It was weird taking the bus in with Clayton – I guess I just need to get used to the fact that I have flatmates now with common interests, rather than the evil twins Kelli and Celeste.

It was choiiiiiice seeing everyone again, and seeing that Jodie was still alive after I lost her in the mosh during Hole at the BDO. Orientation was a fucking waste of time, man. We just got dealt some big speech about harrassment while we all sat and took the piss. Still, it was a good gossip oppotunity, which is always a bonus. Afterwards we went exploring the all brand spanking new B Block. It’s so COOL man – it smells so nice and new, and I picked up a free diary which smells nice and new too. Here, you can have a look at it. This is my timetable for the first haf of the year.

Cruisy huh? Just in case you wanna get really stalky on me, most of my lectures are held at the main campus, and most of the tutorials are in the State Insurance Building. The classes I’m doing are Radio Production, Mass Communication, TV Production and Public Relations Communication. Good shit huh? I certainly hope so anyways.

So yeah, once we’d finished marvelling at the campus, I did a little unsuccessful stalking via cellphone, and went off to run errands with various people. I got one of those funkyass bus passes, and then I went to collect my exams from last year. My god, I got 75% in my Mass Comm Exam! I rule sooo much given that I didn’t study at all for it. And I did okay in Politics too, given that I didn’t study for that either. We won’t even discuss Principles of Writing, except to say that whoever marked it commented “the unstructured nature of this is probably in part due to its subject matter” – ie – if you want better marks, don’t write about spooky acid trips.

Mmmmmm. Then I went to the Cut Above Hair Academy, and got my hair cut. I so loooooove it there. It’s only $10 and that includes a shampoo. Mmmmmmmmmm I’m in Heaven when people are playing with my hair – I love being pampered. So yeah. I heard my cellie ringing when I was having my hair washed, but obviously couldn’t get up to answer it. I’d also been getting annoymus pages – but only cos Clare was too stupid to remember to sign her name (I still love you though). Anyways, the haircut was lovely, and she spent like half an hour blowdrying it so it looked really styley. There’s nothing like a new haircut to make you feel vain.

Took the bus home then, and went to bed. I heard Clayton and Leyton come home at some stage, but didn’t especially feel like talking to them, so I went back to sleep. When I woke up, it was around 6pm and no one had started on dinner, and horror-of-horrors – Clayton was on my computer! I walked into the dining room and was like “YOU ARE SO FULLY BUSTED” – he even took me seriously for a moment too.

I decided I couldn’t be bothered with dinner, so eventually I ate toast. Leyton kept harping on at me about how we were going to pay for food and stuff, since he wants to do seperate things, but also communal – just to reaaaaaally complicate things! But I guess it’s good that he’s doing his own thing, because I was talking to Jeremy today who used to live in the same hostel and he goes “Leyton? He eats like a horse”. Ewww and then I overheard Leyton and Clayton talking, and L was saying how he used to be nicknamed the horse, and C was making rude jokes and I was like eww ewwwwww ewwww. I’m such a snob, I know. But honestly, if y’all met this guy………

I hid out in my room a lot of the evening, doing my time table. Oh, and one of the ex-tenant’s MOTHER came around to get the landlord’s number – I thought it’d be a bit cruel to tell her that her son had been growing dope in his room (I asked her which bedroom was his). She called the guy who had the room that I’d see kilos of dope in a Mongrel – or some word like that. Hahahah go Lady, go! She was really nice.

Friday 29; January, 1999
I figured it was time I tried to make this page look a tiny bit more classy, so here we are. Typing inside a frame because it’s easier that way. Is that okay? Ooooh, I’m liking the slight change in colour-scheme. I hope you’re liking it too. After all, without you, I’m nothing.

The orange goes so well with the purple, and it’s my little tribute to Jo, too. I miss her stacks. The summer of 97/98 I spent mostly with Amy – when I wasn’t with Matt – but this summer I spent most of my time with Jo, so I’m just used to being able to drive over to Miramar, pick her up and go to the beach or town or whatever. Of course now though, I’m in Auckland, and she’s in Christchurch, hopefully doing okay. Xoxoxoxo to you when you read this, hon.

Gosh, I’m being so damn cliquey in this entry today, huh? I know through one of my many counters (yes, I’m obsessed) where people are finding this site from. Most of the people who read my journal have it bookmarked. Others come to Ego Much? from Holloway, Green Oatmeal and also another site where I have some writing posted. (Oh, is there a missing link there? What, AGAIN? Man, I must be forgetful). Talking about Green Oatmeal, I really do suggest that you go and look at it. I was so thrilled when I went back today and discovered that Beth has a JOURNAL up now. She’s so funny, I love her site to bits.

Oh yeah, and speaking of worship (yes, I know this entry is turning just completly self indulgent and internet-people obsessed) Holloway Matthew had some really really interesting things to say about reading other people’s pages which I’d quote, except it’s like too long, so go here and read it for yourself. He gets brownie points for listing me as a ‘really great person’. Wahoo.

I watched Havoc tonight, which probably explains why I’m being so stuck up and self-indulgent. It was their big-day-out special and all the Hole footage made me go “awwwwwwww” and want to be back there. It was a truely truely mind blowing experiance. I love Courtney Love, so I thought all her banter was great, but I guess I can see how people who didn’t like her would hate it. Maybe that’s what my page is like – to a great lesser extent. I mean, I know there are people who enjoy reading it, because they like me. I also know there are people who don’t enjoy reading it, because they don’t like me. Quick question then – WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU HERE? Everyone can ask themselves that, not just the people who dislike me.

Other things that are noteworthy – ummm there’s more stuff on the Written page in case I didn’t already mention that. It’s all old stuff, but now it’s actually linked to. Also I updated my Leaving page, making it far more snobby, so that it’s all sites that I actually respect. No more links to ugly pages from people I know off IRC that really have very little to offer. Fuck I’m nasty these days. Oh well.

I had the worst night’s sleep ever – I had to get up at 5.30am cos I was too hot, and bitten and stuff, so I booted up my computer and talked to Heidi – that’s Simon’s girlfriend who’s back in Finland now. We’re starting a brothel together. She rocks so much – me and Jo taught her all our annoying little sayings (“you’re malcolm”, “on the piss”, “sucks to my asthma” etc) and she’s still using them, and is doing her best to spread them around. The landlord rang me out of bed at 9am, and came around half an hour later with the locksmith – so that’s definatly worth getting up for. Layton’s bed and desk got delivered, and he himself arrived. I talked to him for a while, then had to excuse myself at 11.30am to go back to bed, where I slept for four hours. I just didn’t know what to talk to him about. Clayton’s moving in on Sunday, so hopefully things will be easier after then. The problem is that I’ve sort of settled into a routine having lived here for a week either by myself, or just with Simon who has pretty much the same habits as me (wake after 12pm, bum around all day online, eat dinner as the first meal of the day, then eat toast at night until about 2am then go to bed). I know I’ll have to get out of that pattern once tech starts up again, but still…. I wonder what it’ll be like living with two people I hardly know that I’m expected to interact with.

Anyways, so that’s probably enough for tonight. Oh yeah, just a little request – PLEASE sign my guestbook if you’re new here, or sign it anyways. I’d love to know what sort of people are reading about me and stuff. Market research and all that.

I’m listening to the Tank Girl soundtrack right now. I miss L7. I miss Grrly 5th form, and Cyst – the zine I made with Penny and Sarah that consisted entirely of putting down Room 6 people.