Hubris.co.nz

Monday June 17th

Today is my birthday, my 22nd to be exact. Any and all of you who haven’t seen me, called, txted or email suck. That’s right, ALL of you. So there.

Work was long but hey, I was weraing my pretty new skirt so at least I looked good.

Evening was Bopha and Berrin which apparently means Little Bear so I love him yelling “HAPPY BIRTHDAY” and breaking like mad as soon as I walked in the door which was a little scary.

Evening was dinner on the pillows at Caravan Serai with Bopha and Jezza and Renee and Maree and KateH and James and KateM and Jody, and oh my god that was so cool apart from getting locked in a toilet stall and having to take the lock off with a knife as an alternative to climbing over the roof into the dust and air vents to get out, but maybe we’ll write about that when we’re soberer, cos I’m actually reaaaaaaally sleep so I migth go sleep and write up an inventory tomorrow. I had a kickass birthday, and it would only have been cooler if You had called. Ha, who’s that You? You all are, maybe. Also, I’m worried that you’re not going to email me again, after my last letter to you which I guess was a suggestion that you shouldn’t, but that’s not really what I want, it’s just what is obviously for the best. But fuck the best! I want the rest! Anji says I should go and leave the boy another note with my number and see if he wants to have coffee, but I’m so not even sure that I wanna see him, I think I just want SOMEONE to fancy. Meh. Think about it tomorrow? For now bed looks all warm and soft and stuff. ANd there’s no one left to drink with cos everyone’s gone to bed and I almost fell asleep in Bopha’s when I wenmt to wake her up for the soccer which she’s not even going to watch (I’m in shock). Yeah, so I’m cold and drunk and mostly really happy, bed would be good here.

Hey, do you think I’m grown up now? We’ll see. xojo.

PS – Did I mention that I set myself on fire yesterday? Whoops!

Me: “I love this song” (She Speeds, Straitjacket Fits) – Anji “I bought a copy of this song when you were seven years old”. How rude. Anyways, so would you firstly like to hear about my day, or about my week so far? Show of hands? Day it is then.

When I woke up, my nose and throat were still sore, stinkies, but hey, at least I’d got some sleep – and strange dreams as usual. I knew i was supposed to go have lunch with Karen but there was fresh baked bread and brie in the kitchen so I figured I’d have breakfast first. And so I did. I also yelled at Mum to please stop asking me questions about what I was up to today because i really can’t take the whole having to be accountable for every second of my time and she knew very well that Karen wasn’t answering her phone because she’d just called and so how was i to have been able to arrange lunch? But Mum was very nice about it and put my clothes in the dryer for me so that i’d have something to wear. Unfortunately that meant that i had to surrendar my sheet but it’s actually fucking cold down here so it’s probably just as well. I wish I’d thought better and packed more warm clothes but then again, I packed whilst stoned <!– he’s such a gentleman that he always lights it for me whenever we smoke –> and in two minutes so I guess that wasn’t the smartest idea ever. But anyways.

Eventually, Anji and Linda were ready so we drove to go and pick up Karen. We’d wanted to go to Imbibe for lunch, cos I’ve never been there, but it wasn’t open, so we went to Olive and I had two absolutly divine coffees and a quesadilla. Mmmmmm Olive coffee. And then Karen and I went shopping, leaving the oldies to look through their photos again. I went and got 200g of X for Mother and 200g of Cuban for myself to take back to Auckland from Midnight Esspresso, and then I tried to decide what to get her for her birthday. Also, if you ever want to get me an amazing present, convince the people in the second hand books/clothes/stuff shop on the corner of Cuba Street and Swan Lane to sell you one of their two giant Playmobil boys. Thank you. I ended up buying Mum “Nature’s Best” which is an NZ music compilation cd that I’d planned on giving to Neil for his birthday, but since that’s in June, I have more time to think of something else for him. I got a free disposable camera with it, even! And I also made myself a beautiful necklace in the Bead Store, for only $3.50. Excellent. And then we went and had hot chocolate at Felix and walked up to the Embassy to get our tickets to see ‘Lord of the Rings’.

LOR has been screening for what – two months now? And the Embassy seats 826 people, but it was still completely full, at a 5.10 session on a Thursday. Crazy. But we did manage to get seats – good seats even, because the woman at the ticket counter took a shine to us and gave us her own personal seats. Yay for that. I liked the movie a lot. I adore Elijah Wood – of course, even if i hadn’t seen the movie I’d still love him from the way he kept hugging all the New Zealand tv reporters at all the previews. And I’d be very happy with a doubleteam of Legalos and Aragorn to defend me. Mmmmm. I’m smutty.

After the movie, we went and got cheap (and not very nice) Malaysian food and then went back to Karen’s apartment where I did things to her that made me laugh and laugh and laugh but what I’m not allowed to write about. And then eventually Anji came and picked me up. So yeah, that was my very very exciting day. So do you want to hear about my week now, or are you already bored and flicking away to something else?

Okay, so Sunday was Ben’s 21st party, kinda, although it ended up being more my friends than his, I think. I got to see Steve and Olivia and Kini though which was cool. And KateM and Elliot, although she told me off for flirting with him but I wasn’t really hardly even. And JeremyO<!– who’s bitter that when I introduced him to s&o&k I was like “but it’s not THAT jeremy” –>. And KateB, of course. Some wanker passed out in my bed and so she slapped me awake from my sleep on the couch to get me to move him. He wouldn’t move so I kicked him and swore at him a lot. Previously he’d been really pervy and disgusting and icky anyways actually, and he makes me so mad I don’t even wanna write about him, so I won’t.

On Monday Justin woke me up by calling to meet me for lunch, and while I was talking on the phone ot him and trying to get my head together, i realised that there was someone lying next to me on the bed so I was like “oh fuck” until my eyes managed to focus and it was just KateB. Phew. Although I’m sure she did dirty things to me while I was sleeping, of course. KateH arrived and we went to drive down to Justin’s work but then my car wouldn’t start because it was completely and utterly drained of petrol, thanks Ben. He is of course refusing to top it up claiming no responsibility, so grrr. KateH even yelled at him over the phone. Anyways. So we ended up calling Justin and meeting him and KateH’s flatmate in the Imax foodcourt, which was a very bad idea beacuse it was very bright and very crowded and Iw as very very ill and everything was spinning and far too dazzling. So as soon as i was able to, I crawled back into bed.

On Tuesday, I was feeling much much better, thank god, and the house was also even a little tidier. It was raining though, and it took FORTY MINUTES to get the Link to Newmarket to meet JeremE for a drink. To put that into perspective for you, I could have walked there in 20, so I really really should have, except that it was raining, and I was wearing heels. Damn rush hour traffic and unreliable buses. But anyways, so I had a drink or two with Jeremy and then we went and got Mercury Plaza and hung out for a while. He left right before the start of the final of The Secret Life of Us, which was excellent timing (KatieH, did you get the tape off Clay yet? he also has your key to our house, presuming he hasn’t given it to The Evil One). So I had a sniffle at the TV show, being the final and all, and then Clay came home. He was cutting a promo for a kid’s movie called “My Dog Skip” and Iw as absolutely disgusted to find myself crying at that. And I did my packing, and shortly after midnight KateB and Mischa arrived to pick me up.

I don’t wanna write about the drive down because there were some fucking freaky things that happened, although it was nice to be with Kate, een if her kitten did piss on me. Just it was very long, and we were both very wired, and seeing accidents is fucking horrible and thinking that maybe a ham sandwich saved your life is fucking freaky as well.

We arrived in Welly about 10.30am and I had a couple of drinks because I was so fucking wired and then tried to sleep. I managed about an hour long nap maybe. Still, in the evening I went out with Anji and Linda (who’s staying here) and we met up with her friend Gregor who bought me a drink and chastised me again for not dressing up as a schoolgirl. I promised him that I would do better next time and that Iw ould have if I’d packed properly. Although i doubt i would have, because it’s SO FUCKIGN COLD down here. And sure i bitch about the heat in Auckland, but it’s always about how the grass is greener on the other side. I like Jet Lounge because they have Finlandia as their house vodka. I also dropped past Ayna’s cos she’d told me she was going to have a big night but she wasn’t home. I got to say hi to Kartini though (who doesn’t live there) and apparently, it’s all about Bass Frontiers on Friday night at Sub9. Excellent. I might even take Anji and Linda with me.

Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Let’s see if I can figure out how to log into Saturn from here. Ohhh apparently I have a cunt directory. Hahahaha excellent.

Hi kids! It’s been ages, hasn’t it? Well I’ve kinda sorted out my Hubris hassles, and we’re back, smaller than ever! I moved my cam directory to Annette’s ihug space, and 1998 and 1999 are now on woos.org, so it’s all good. I’ll put the links on ummm my 404 page possibly, so look there if you can’t find what you’re after.

So, what have I been up to this past week or so? Well since I wasn’t able to access Hubris, I wrote this and this on Swinney.org. I like places that let you in without a dress code. I’ve also worked damn hard suprisingly this week. I joined the Freemasons. But you read that on Swinney. I got my first ever four digit pay cheque, yay me. Of course, most of that will go to Entertainz and my car insurance and water bills and phone bills and my parents and paying off my bank overdraft, but still, I’m super excited.

We still haven’t found a place to stay in Taupo yet, and still I’m constantly inviting more friends to come along. I think we’re up to a group of 10 probably. We wanted to stay with Jarrod, but it seems too many people are coming up from Welly to stay with him already. Saint Pats boys!!!! Muhahahah.

I’m currently trading emails with one of the guys that I rang off Penny’s cellphone last friday whilst very drunk and making random calls. Apparently i told him we were meant to be together, based on his last name, which I remember, and I advised him never to get married, which i don’t remember. You can say a lot in voicemail, I guess. I got the photos from that night back, but I might scan them in welly, cos I can’t be assed doing it right now. I’ve done too much graphical stuff already. We’re making tapes for Friends of Garland as Xmas pressies, and I was responsible for the exceedingly stylish cover design. I’m also the one dubbing the tapes at high speed (I need a cd burner) and singing along at matching high speeds. It’s very scary, I tell you. Alvin Simon Theodore. Do do do do do do. Where’s the xentertainment article on THEM eh?

We had Garland Xmas Dinner tonight, although Jeremy’s already in Dunedin. I made fettucine with Chicken, sundried tomato, olives, walnuts and a blue brie and white wine sauce. It was yuuuuummy. For dessert we had toffee ice cream, strawberries and chocolate vodka. I haven’t had chocolate vodka in waaay too long, but as Bradley brought me back a bottle of Absolut from Australia, it was possible, bless him. I love my flatmates so so much, I almost shed a tear after dinner when we were exchanging Xmas gifts. They’re my best friends and my lifeblood. Plus they gave me a Bear Mask for xmas! And some noodle bowls. Clay and I got Brad an excellent book on Bears, and I got Clay an under $15 Wine Guide. Brad got Clay a pokemon watch.

There’s just something very very wrong about a guy giving his girlfriend flavoured condoms for Xmas – i mean why not just give her a tool kit or a bowling ball and be done with it? Really, who’s going to gain the maximum benefit out of that gift after all?

The other day – well, Wednesday to be exact, after work and a cold shower for me (long hot sweaty drive home) Brad and I went up to investigate our new Local, which used to be a restaurant called Forte, and before that a restaurant called Amadeus. It still has an odd man standing outside it, but it’s now a pub called “The Horse and Jockey” which is appropriate given its proximety to the Ellerslie Race Course. I bought him a pint. He bought me a pint. It was still too hot to bother walking home so I bullied him into a third (“what do you have to get up for tomorrow? what do you have to do with your life anyways?”) and after that the fourth one came easy. When we finally made it home (it’s my New Years Resolution to become a Regular, and recognize other patrons and make jokes with the staff in some establishment, so it may as well be that one) we watched “Young Americans” which I’d taped last week and saved to watch with Brad when he got back from Australia. It’s a Dawson’s tie-in because one of the main characters was Pacey’s friend in two episodes, but it’s by no means at the same level. I know it took me a while to get fully into Dawsons, but this show’s apparently only got eight episodes made. Ahh well.

On Sunday night I went to Helen’s house for dinner. I am at one with the shore. There was petanque and badminton on the lawn. It was very choice even though I got eaten alive by mosquitos. I talked to PR girls who were all seemingly jealous that I have a PR job now despite doing Multimedia. I like my job, even though I occasionally have too much free time on my hands and my dad doesn’t always email me back when I want him too.

I applied for another job the other day (remember I’m only on a short project contract) but I was talking to the woman at the recruitment agency after I sent in my CV, and she basically said that I was too good for the job and would end up being bored silly. Nice. But she’s putting me on the books incase anything better comes up. I was talking to Lola this morning, because there was a bad article published in one of the local papers that was related to what we are doing, and she said we might have to change course with our project. I asked if I’d still have a job then, and she pointed out that I’m contracted until the 28th of February, and they’d have to find something for me to do. Yay, I’ve loved it so far. I mean how many other girls get to go into Freemason temples? And the whole car access is choice. I admit, I kinda semi plan my meetings to fall between 10-11am cos that’s my favourite hour on the radio. But I have the freedom to do that. Edina and Lola both think I’m doing really good work, so wahoo.

But i have two weeks holiday now so hopefulyl I won’t talk about work too much. There was a semi xmas party this morning. Well, the Communications Department, which I am a part of although I physically work in another area, and am involved only in communications for that other area, had breakfast out today, but I got to work too late, and Lola was already gone by the time I got there, and although I knew where they were, I felt too dumb to go along. And then the division I’m in had drinks after 11am. Of course, because I’d missed out on breakfast, I had a couple of sips of bubbly and felt all funny, so I had to leave (despite how unfascinating the people in my workspace are!) and eat something at a nearby cafe.

I really am rambling now eh. You know, I wasn’t too distraught when I couldn’t get into Hubris. I wasn’t even that distraught when I couldn’t get into Email.com. I guess it’s all a matter of priorities. But don’t worry – there’s no way I’m giving up this web site. No indeed!

Don’t forget in/out for like, other info.

xoxo

Me (in bear mask)”roaaaaar!” Kara: “eeek!” Me:”Sorry, I didn’t mean to score you. I mean, scare you”

Today I went to go read the thing I’d sent to my mailing list about the scratches on my arm, but then it turns out I didn’t actually send anything to my mailing list at all. I did write about some bushes on Swinney.org though, and I guess that’s like the same thing, kinda. Last night I was sitting around crying after the season finale of Shortland Street, so I rang up Penny and asked her if she wanted to come around and get drunk. Of course she did. Jeremy came to the bottle store with us too, so we decided to have a cocktail night.

Sparing you all the details, we drank and laughed a lot. Penny and I reminisced a great deal. We gossiped. We danced on the front terrace. I rang Kini&Olivia and was terribly hurt that neither of them want to live with me. We took a series of dumbass photos which you can view here. We rang random people from Penny’s cellphone list that she wasn’t sure she knew, and had very amusing conversations. One guy had just been fined $13,000 for reckless driving. Jeremy gave us random numbers to call too, and then his friend kept calling him back. I bit Penny but didn’t leave any bruise marks, to our deepest regret. Around 2am we decided we’d go be larrikans out in the streets. I refused to go the park around the corner, so we walked up to Shell instead, then walked back playing Pringle Soccer. I had my camera so we took a succession of fantastic supermodel pose shots. We poll danced. Jeremy climbed a tree. I found myself unable to balance walk along a wall without holding onto Penny on one side, which made me mad cos I was really really good at the Beam in Primary school. Penny jumped into a bush which looked like fun, so I did the same, except it wasn’t all boingy like I was thinking it would be, in fact it was sharp and ouchy and I have deep gashes from it.

Today I woke up to say bye bye to Penny (also cos her phone with a goddam novelty ring kept going off in my room) but then went back to sleep, which is always fun to do cos the heat makes me have dirty dreams. I got up much much later then, and spent an hour reading the herald and stuff. My saturdays are so so cruisy. In the evening we did a tremendously huge heap’o dishes and cleaned up the kitchen proper, which was good. I did laundry. Stuff like that. At night, Jeremy and I were watching “Fast Times at Ridgemont High” (I LOVE TV3 for deciding to screen 80s teen flicks every Saturday) but Kara kept ringing for Clay who’d gone to bed with an infected foot. She was going to bus over, but I told her I’d go pick her up from work, cos she’s much too nice to take a bus home at 11.30 at night. It’s just as well I did pick her up actually, cos there were literally hundreds of people waiting for buses in Newmarket cos of Christmas in the Park. Ick. “Order! Order!”

I have never taken my pants off while driving before today, and I must admit it was kinda fun. It’s fucking hot coming home in the late afternoons, and traffic moves slow enough to allow you to do things like that – if you’re wearing a skirt over pants as usual anyways, that is. I wanted to take my shirt off and just be in my sparkly singlet as well, but as my singlet was on over the shirt, that might have been a bit too much of a mission.

No driving today except for the commute which seems to get more and more annoying every day. I did make lots of phone calls and send out lots of official emails and stuff. I write up my every move on my task list in Outlook and it’s way too satisfying to be able to tick things off. I also emailed my dad and he called me an Angel. I thought that was so very sweet you can see it here. Yes, new page section alert. It’s kinda sparse right now. Kini gets it though, so she rocks.

Shopping in The’Puna at lunchtime, I came across a store called “Between the Sheets” and so I’d just like to actively encourage you all to spend $429 and buy me the duvet cover set on the first bed in the store. Thank you. I found what I wanna get Clay – a book on under $15 wines (Or maybe i should get him a book on under 15 girls), and we’re getting Jeremy one of those barking flipping dogs (don’t ask) but I could not find a book about Bears anywhere. Well admittedly I only went into two book shops. So instead I rang Karen in Welly since she does work for the best bookshop in the country, and told her to find me one. You know, more people should write books about bears. In fact, I think that all you people out there planning on writing novels should just flag that idea and write bear books instead. If you’re too poor to actually photograph bears, get your friends to dress up in animal costumes and photograph them instead. IN FACT, do both animals and animal suits if you can. That’d be great. “Bears and Bear Costumes” – how good does that sound?

I got my final results today – straight A’s, unsuprisingly. Well, an ‘A’ in Instructional Design, a slightly disappointing A- in Multimedia Project, and an A+ in Multimedia Broadcasting. I got an ‘A’ in Multimedia Production last semester, and I should have got an A in Graphics only I fucked up the exam and got a B+ so I did pretty well. (We just won’t mention the B- in 3D modeling, cos that was to be expected, as was the C in Mass Comm). Who’s a little girlie swat? Who’s a little girlie swat?

I’m applying for more jobs already now. I think an eight page cv/portfolio was waay too excessive though. I must learn to be more abrupt. “Order! Order!”

I’m so so sunburnt. Well, not drastically so, but enough to give me a headache. Too much sun from driving around in the morning in a station wagon this time. I’m actually getting a little tired of traffic, strangely enough.

I got my first pay slip today! It was only for three days work, but now for the first time in the past six months, I actually have a positive bank balance! Xmas shopping here I come.

I talked to Mum on the phone tonight and she asked if I was going to be in Welly for New Years and said that they were going to go tramping in Mt Tongararo. For a minute there I was afraid she was going to invite me along, but she wasn’t. Phew!

I’m assembling my portfolio which means that my mailing list is currently going to get emailed a whole stack’o old articles that I wrote back in 1997. Lucky them.

I only have restricted Internet access at work – “This Page does not appear to be work related – please view it after hours”. How rude!

Brad’s in Australia for the week with Morrison. Jeremy goes away for a month on Sunday. We’re going to buy him a flipping barking dog. Clayton’s going on the 23rd. I am too. But Brad will be back by then, so don’t get any burglering ideas.

All the motels in Taupo are fully booked. I wonder if random people would mind if we just pitched tents on their lawns. I really must get someone to call Jarrod.

“Order! Order!”

So I’ve been online for like 30 minutes and I still haven’t managed to read a single one of my emails yet. I really must change email accounts.

I bought two heads of brocoli today at 15 cents a head each. This is a good thing. I got them in Northcote, if you’re interested. Today again I was driving around the Shore investigating venues. It’s great. I like Rob in the car division – he gave me a manual drive car today when I told him about the stupid things I did with the automatic last week (I was wondering why the car braked so damn jerky when I was being super gentle until I realised that I was using my left foot on the brake, which as we all know is wrong). There’s a couple’o pajs parked down in amongst the company car pool too – I’ve promised Brad and Clay I’m going to try my hardest to get to take a paj out for the day and I’ll come and pick them up and we’ll drive through Remmers darling. Anyways. So yeah, Northcote/Birkenhead in the morning, then Devenport and Albany in the afternoon.

I had a meeting with the PR Consultant lady I’m working with who’s only in 2 days a week and gave my report and she said I was going well, and that I have full authority to go ahead and book the venues and start drawing up a timetable. Scaaary! I’d much rather someone was checking me every step of the way, but I just don’t have that at work – they leave me up to my own devices. I’m very good at looking busy. I have email at work now, finally my own key and login, but so far I’ve only given my email address to essential contacts (read: Kini and Olivia). I’m trying to be good. I don’t want to fuck this all up. I’m alredy worried about finding a job in February, because I know I have a tendancy not to be very good at seeking things out because basically everything i ever need falls in my lap. Except for my paycheque – grrr! I don’t get paid for a fortnight, and I’m in malls and shopping areas for half the morning – all my xmas shopping could be done by now if I had a cent left in the bank. Ahh well. Tomorrow I’m going to be in a working party conference anyways. Have I mentioned that I get business cards?

Wank wank wank wank wank. I actually am often left without anything to do, so I call Shirley, and since I’m in an open planned office, the people around me would hear
“Hi, it’s Joanna here from *, is that you Shirley? How are you?…….. Right, I’m calling in regards to the communication briefing I received the other day……….. No no, that’s fine……..yes I was in contact yesterday but we decided to not pursue that avenue any further for a while…. yes of course it’s re-occuring….I appreciate that…. absolutely, I’ll just make a note of that…….. yes…. yes….. well would you have some time free for a meeting?…….. how’s today for you?…..alright well we’ll scheduale something for next week then” and then my boss will come back and I’ll want to ask her something so I’ll hang up on Shirley really abruptly going “Great, well thank you very much for your time”. I’m SO a kid in heels and pearls. Nevermind the fact that the rest of the office spends their lives on the phone having really boring conversations with their car insurance and real estate agent places that I can’t help but evesdrop on. Or maybe they’re all speaking in a secret code too. Hmmmmmmm, intriguing!

Because I spent so much time driving today, I came up with a list of memorable car moments that I jotted down because I was bored. You know how I like my lists. Sheesh, anyone would think that I was incapable of stringing together anything more cohesive. And ha! I’m going to alphabetize them by the first letter in the sentence:

• A memory from Primary School; the greatest day of my life ever at that stage was when I got to sit squashed up next to my Crush – Andrew Carnegie – to and from a netball tournament
• Amy and Andee taking me over the harbour bridge by mistake, playing the Spice Girls and bumping the car to cheer me up
• Anji and Greg taking me up to Auckland for Pearl Jam when I was 14, determined to corrupt me and we picked up a dumb hitchhiker who said “Youse guys”
• Countless Welly/Auck drives with Kate B, listening to Cat Stevens, blowing bubbles and taking mad photos left right and centre
• Driving myself to Wellington thinking so hard that later I wrote a 7 page essay on the appropriate course of action to take as a consequence of that thought process
• Driving to Welly with Simon and Matt Sawkill in the backseat, me giggling away to myself like the cat that’s got the cream and is mixing its metaphors like a DJ with religion.
• Going to Waiuku for Kate H’s goodbye party, Justin putting the car in neutral going down a hill and it kept going, freefalling
• Kim speeding along Greenlane West at 3am in the fog when we were on a mad sugar rush and couldn’t see 10 feet ahead of us
• Kini in my rear view mirror, the magical drive into the Coramandel
• MM in the MR2, subwoofer under my seat, lost in Remuera at 4am trying to find food cos we’d been up arguing all night
• Pajero pulling up outside my house in Mount Roskill, Shirley and Dee Cavalry coming to be with me when I found out that Opa died
• Pixie’s friend Sam’s orange pumpkin car, tinnie house in Te Atatu right next to a primary school and I thought we’d be beaten up by protective westie parents
• Roadtripping to Waihi with Shirley, her doing crazy overtaking manouvers and making Trudie scream when I dared her to drive down a bank
• Sung Song association all the way to St. Heliers with Brad in the stereoless Grey Ghost
• the other night in Jeremy’s car, cold from swimming, falling asleep on Clayton’s shoulder

I warned you that i have full stationary cupboard rights – notepads are perfect for lists.

“I think you’re crazy, maybe, I think you’re crazy.”

Sleep in goooooooood. Boring day, reading Herald nice and relaxing. Lying back in bed after shower even nicer, listening to the CD I bought in Sydney even better. I love Kini.

Eventually Clayt, Jeremy Renee and I headed off to Long Bay – or is it Long Beach and are we ganstas? – for Jody’s bbq gettogether. Long drive, but it was in Jeremy’s car, which has red plush on the backseats, so that was cool. Actually, it reminded me heaps of Craccum Gareth’s car, so that was entertaining.

Jody’s friends are a little ummm – cliquey – but she’s still one of the coolest people I know. We called Shirley and got her and Richard to come from section 2 to section 13. While the boys were trying to barbeque, her and I went wading, me carrying my jeans above my skirt, and it was really cool. We had the best talk too. She said something about how it’s been cool for her to watch me change over the years and to see me growing stronger, and I agree. Yeah, good good good talk, an and I feel nice afterwards. BBQ’ed sausages were actually super nice, despite the fact that they’d seemed a little dubious. Jody etc packed up and left cos the park shut its gate at 9pm (Shirley and Jeremy had the good sense to move their cars out of the gate earlier). We’d just finished eating when Shirley and I started yelling at each other, baiting to go swimming, so I had to, stripping off to a slip and knickers knickers knickers behind a bush. We’d been drinking bubbly from plastic cups and it was getting dark which made it easier. Swinning was absolutely lovely. The water was warm and really really real, and I was with Shirley, who I love to pieces. My boobs would occasionally pop outta my slip, but generally when I was under water, and like she said -s he’s seen it all before anyways. We pledged to go Orgasm Shopping together. Heh.

It was dark and stuff, so I put my clothes back on – comando actually in my jeans, and I was bitching about it, so Clay was like “oooohkay” so i got mad and yelled “if you guys can hear in detail about how to give head, you can damn well listen to how uncomfortable I am that I’m not wearing underwear” and he conceeded I was right, so I chuckled lots and probably clutched at him to stay upright. Then, walking back to the car, we came across a children’s play area, so we had to stop and play. I freaked out totally over teh flying fox, because I was never a fan, even as a kid, but I was drunk enough to try it out, figuring the grass was soft enough to fall onto, and it was sooooo cool. I was screaming and laughing the whole way down, of course. And then we were playing in the fort, which was a bubbley structure pretty much like they have at every Burger King. As I’m a little larger than your average kid, I managed to get semi stuck in one part of it, but luckily my legs bend in all sorts of ways so I could untangle myself and go down the tunnel slide, shrieking all the way. It was cool. The drive home I spent going “Hurry up! Hurry up!” because I really needed to pee. Jeremy’s boycotting Shell becasue of their actions in Nigeria – good on him. I wish I followed all the No Logo ethics.

Anyways, back at home, Brad was all grumpy, so Clay and I decided to go without him. I changed my clothes and stuff, and paid Jeremy $5 to drive us (skinfl

Arrrrrrrrr!

That’s me in my pirate hat. Actually it became like, cooler than a pirate’s hat, but it was a pirate’s hat in the first place. Brad and I were sitting in the lounge bored, so we decided to make hats. I made a matching fan. He made a sword. Then we decided Jeremy should play too, so we made him a hat and a parrot (which looked suprisingly like a Japanese Crane) and went and knocked on his bedroom door. We handed him the hat, and he was like “where are we going?” We like that in a flatmate! So we went to ye old town’o food.

Work today was actually very cool. I sent out my first professional email – admittedly not using my own login yet. I don’t have my own login yet, or my own swipe card, but I should have by tomorrow. Hopefully. What I did have, however, was a huge ass bubble blister from my new shoes and from pursuing information all over the Puna, but I deflated it. Where oh where does all that liquid come from? But yeah anyways, I did enjoy work a lot, except it’s quite challenging. Which yes, is a good thing, but I had to think! And think! And I feel kinda like I wanna have every single thing I do checked over, but I can’t, cos how unproffesional would that be? Apparently Trevor, who was also in my project team and my broadcasting team is working in the same place that I am though, so I must email him and maybe have lunch with him or something like that. Stoked that we both got jobs out of it!

Arrrrrrrrr! Arrrrrrrrr! I was all tired before and falling asleep while Shirley was over, but pretending to be a pirate invigorated me. I have a notepad with lists in it now. I like it. I have lists of work tasks, lists of questions I need to ask at work, lists of stuff I need to buy and bills I need to pay. It’s funny, cos I was doing all this stuff on the computer, and I felt fine until my boss lady #1, whom I shall call umm well I can’t think of a witty name right now, handed me a page on RSI stuff and readjusted my chair and keyboard level so that I’d be “right”.

“Subject to the provisions of the * Information and Meetings Act 1987, all transactions, records and information pertaining to the business of * shall be held in strict confidence by you both during the period of employment and also after its termination”

Surely there’s nothing better than sticking your hand inside a turkey first thing when you wake up, unless it’s getting to wipe all the blood and wet stuff off said turkey. Or yelling “Hold still you bitch” or “oh yeah, ram me full of that stuffing”. Kitchen sports are so much fun! I spent this morning finishing off the cooking for today’s lunch – I was up until 2am making pumpkin pies last night. The boys were terrific and did highly challenging tasks like peeling potatos and stuff. Anyways, eventually everything was in the oven and I could go have a shower and make myself stunning.

Shirley arrived while I was still getting dressed, so I was able to tell her that I wasn’t decent without running myself down too much. Helen came along too, and demanded that I take her photo:

The turkey took about three hours or more, which meant that everyone had assembled (I think we had 15 people) and were well into their assorted wines by the time it was ready. Just before I brought it out of the oven and carved, I got everyone to assemble around the dining room table and say what they were thankful for. Sure, I ripped the idea straight out of a Dawson’s episode, but the whole idea for having Thanksigiving Dinner was from Dawson’s too, so it was very appropriate. It was actually really touching. Some people went serious, some went funny. I said I was thankful for all the people assembled, because I loved them so much, and they made my life, and they were all so much more special to me than they could ever know, and it’s true. So there.

Yes anyways, sappiness aside, I’m so so stoked, cos my turkey turned out juicy and luscious and scrummy, even though I’d never cooked one before. Unfortunately, the small ‘Turkey Roast’ we bought to accompany it was icky – can we say “sausage”, boys and girls? Don’t ever buy one! But the actual bird roast was good – so well cooked that the meat slid off the bones. Yay me. I’m so so proud. I mean, Mum’s never even cooked turkey. Anyways, enough boasting.

So everyone got all sleepy after lunch, and no wonder, cos of the heat and the alcohol and all the food. We had four couches and a bed in our lounge, and there were people stretched out on all of them, entwined with whoever else was sharing their seat. It was kinda touching. After dessert, I took an eiderdown out to the lawn and lay out there with Helen and Shirley and Jeremy, eating Rum Spiders (you know – coke and icecream) and giggling my head off. “I have a grass problem”.

Eventually, Kate M drove me on a Beer and Chuppies mission. Previous days had taught us that there was no Summer Ale at either Woolworths 277 or Foodtown, so we went to the Winemasters shop. It was very cold in the Chiller with bare feet. I hadn’t brought my wallet with me, since I’d just fished $30 out of the Booty Tin (we asked everyone to pay $5 for lunch to cover some costs) so I had no ID, and Morrison didn’t have her driver’s licence on her either, just tech ID and old licence. The lady let us have the beer, but warned us that they were cracking down and we should always carry our id. That place is always strict, how rude! When we got back to the house, we found everyone playing cricket in our newly cleaned carport. How industrious!

Everyone was all dozey until around 6.30pm, just snacking and drinking some more, and then Miss World came on. Boy did we ever tear strips off all the contestants! Oh lordy, did I just say “tear strips off” ? Did I just say “Oh lordy” ? Super! Anyways, around then, Renee asked where the nearest Accident and Emergency Clinic was, as she was having an allergic reaction to something, which seemed kinda scary, so i went with her and we got Nigel to drive us to the Ascot Hospital. Dead posh! We waited for ages, and Renee just seemed to get sicker and sicker, so eventually Nige and I went to the counter and said “look, our friend is having kind of a really bad allergic reaction” and since she was streched out lying down on the seats and was bright red from sunburn anyways, they rushed her off to a doctor, and I went in with her (sure, I’ve only ever met her at parties basically when I’ve been very drunk, but Jeremy was in no state to go to the hospital with her, and I figure it’s good of me to bond with flatmates’ girlfriends. To say nothing of the fact that I was kinda scared and like to help out in an emergency). Anyways, the doctor gave her some antibiotics and sent us off back home. She felt better after some panadol and a sleep.

I missed a significant part of Miss World, plus I’d accidently found out who’d won anyways, so that ruined a bit of the night, but ahh well. Jodie and Helen both left after Miss World, as did Nige and Andy. But Maree showed up then, which was sweet as bro. We played Bluffinitions. It was very amusing. I won. All those words we’d never heard of before!

I had a headache, so I’m going to manipoo now.

“Actually I quite like Waikato Draught” – Helen