Hubris.co.nz

Tonight Kate, Laura, Kim and I made a pledge that we wouldn’t hang out at all this week until we get together on Saturday and wear red and green and cry at election results. Also, while I’m adding in links, it thrilled me beyond words that Kim said that when we get married she will change her last name to Hubris. But back to the narrative.

So there we were, in a room full of bajillions of people cramming our faces with the most amazing kinds of vegetables and pies ever at Mika’s thanksgiving. It turns out that she lives just around the corner from me, so when we were giving thanks (remember that amazing time I cooked my first ever turkey and it was perfect back at Garland? Holy crapula that was 11 years ago. Woah.), I mentioned that, and how I wanted to hang out with her more. It is nice having new friends. The other thing I was majorly thankful for is that my foster kitty Milo who had escaped on Monday night while I was in Auckland for work and had kittysitters showed up again last night. She is adorable. I should stop crawling into the spare bed drunkenly and hanging out with my fosterinos, because when they snuggle up I’m all like “awww, can’t I keep you?”. And I probably can’t.

I decided since Mika lives so close that I would take a hot pre-dinner snack as my contribution, and it was Thanksgiving-themed, so I came up with these Savoury Thanksgiving Tartlets:

Thanksgiving tartlet filling: roast pumpkin, craisins, feta, red onion and parsley

Other things this weekend of note included a Fatty Boom clothing swap at Emma’s. I got to hang out with Ally who I worship. In fact, just between you and me, I used to retumbl pictures of her and call her my secret internet girlfriend before we met. Now of course I’m much too shy to do that. But at least I got into her skirt, even if she was no longer in it. It was also lovely seeing Emma and Simon again, who I don’t get to hang out with nearly enough.

So yes, onwards and upwards into a week with no social events scheduled except for possibly a few drinks after work on Friday with someone I used to work with in 2006 who now works with Anji. Fingers crossed I can stick to the no socialising plan. You’re wishing me luck, right?

For some reason (I think it was the two glasses of Amaretto with dessert and as Lisa and Brad did the dishes), I kind of thought that when I turned on my computer tonight there’d be an email from you. Of course there wasn’t. Maybe it was the music. Maybe it would be that after we all joined hands and gave thanks for things (three course dinner + it having just been American Thanksgiving = me being cheesy as fuck) we talked about our years in review, and the good things and the bad things and the plain old weird & strange things that went on. And of course that was the category that you fell in to.

Of course both Lisa and Brad were driving so they sat there laughing at me as I drank more and more to cover up the oh god the pain the pain of the fact that the dinner had originally been planned for six people and I’d spent all Saturday night cooking for it, but of course my group of friends never work to the same schedule that I do (plan something waaaaaaay in advance and they’ll change their minds at the alst minute – plan it at the last minute and they’ll be busy) so consequently there are more chocolate mousses sitting in the frige waiting for me to eat them ath that’s nto a bad thing. There are also six chicken, vege and feta pies in the freezer, leftover saffron risotto in the fridge and I sent the rest of the kumara & corn chowder home with Brad. No one saw how it took me two goes to make three white chocolate spirals – the first time the bag melted. Oh the drama of it all. I love to cook big elabroate meals but I wish it was easier to get peole to come over and eat them. All I really want to do with my life is entertain people.

Lisa and I watched the Birds DVD and it made me sad as Bic Runga can do, and also discussion about the eyar in general made me a little sad because while it’s been a good year on the whole (I’m making 9k more than I used to!), I miss things like the potential of the crush I had in February, and the anticipation of my American holiday and so forth. Now Keanu Reeves is on the television so I must go find another glass of water, Scrubs DVDs and mentally prepare myself for the difficult meetings I have tomorrow. Joy!

The rest of the week will be busy. I must eat my eggplant tomorrow (that’s not a euphemism but rather a “well it fucking cost $4.95″ statement), and then on Tueday I have dinner with Katy, a drink with Karts on Wednesday, Helen’s shop opening on Thursday, and then of course the Wellingtonista Awards on Friday. Woo, vote for me! Um, if you want to.

Surely there’s nothing better than sticking your hand inside a turkey first thing when you wake up, unless it’s getting to wipe all the blood and wet stuff off said turkey. Or yelling “Hold still you bitch” or “oh yeah, ram me full of that stuffing”. Kitchen sports are so much fun! I spent this morning finishing off the cooking for today’s lunch – I was up until 2am making pumpkin pies last night. The boys were terrific and did highly challenging tasks like peeling potatos and stuff. Anyways, eventually everything was in the oven and I could go have a shower and make myself stunning.

Shirley arrived while I was still getting dressed, so I was able to tell her that I wasn’t decent without running myself down too much. Helen came along too, and demanded that I take her photo:

The turkey took about three hours or more, which meant that everyone had assembled (I think we had 15 people) and were well into their assorted wines by the time it was ready. Just before I brought it out of the oven and carved, I got everyone to assemble around the dining room table and say what they were thankful for. Sure, I ripped the idea straight out of a Dawson’s episode, but the whole idea for having Thanksigiving Dinner was from Dawson’s too, so it was very appropriate. It was actually really touching. Some people went serious, some went funny. I said I was thankful for all the people assembled, because I loved them so much, and they made my life, and they were all so much more special to me than they could ever know, and it’s true. So there.

Yes anyways, sappiness aside, I’m so so stoked, cos my turkey turned out juicy and luscious and scrummy, even though I’d never cooked one before. Unfortunately, the small ‘Turkey Roast’ we bought to accompany it was icky – can we say “sausage”, boys and girls? Don’t ever buy one! But the actual bird roast was good – so well cooked that the meat slid off the bones. Yay me. I’m so so proud. I mean, Mum’s never even cooked turkey. Anyways, enough boasting.

So everyone got all sleepy after lunch, and no wonder, cos of the heat and the alcohol and all the food. We had four couches and a bed in our lounge, and there were people stretched out on all of them, entwined with whoever else was sharing their seat. It was kinda touching. After dessert, I took an eiderdown out to the lawn and lay out there with Helen and Shirley and Jeremy, eating Rum Spiders (you know – coke and icecream) and giggling my head off. “I have a grass problem”.

Eventually, Kate M drove me on a Beer and Chuppies mission. Previous days had taught us that there was no Summer Ale at either Woolworths 277 or Foodtown, so we went to the Winemasters shop. It was very cold in the Chiller with bare feet. I hadn’t brought my wallet with me, since I’d just fished $30 out of the Booty Tin (we asked everyone to pay $5 for lunch to cover some costs) so I had no ID, and Morrison didn’t have her driver’s licence on her either, just tech ID and old licence. The lady let us have the beer, but warned us that they were cracking down and we should always carry our id. That place is always strict, how rude! When we got back to the house, we found everyone playing cricket in our newly cleaned carport. How industrious!

Everyone was all dozey until around 6.30pm, just snacking and drinking some more, and then Miss World came on. Boy did we ever tear strips off all the contestants! Oh lordy, did I just say “tear strips off” ? Did I just say “Oh lordy” ? Super! Anyways, around then, Renee asked where the nearest Accident and Emergency Clinic was, as she was having an allergic reaction to something, which seemed kinda scary, so i went with her and we got Nigel to drive us to the Ascot Hospital. Dead posh! We waited for ages, and Renee just seemed to get sicker and sicker, so eventually Nige and I went to the counter and said “look, our friend is having kind of a really bad allergic reaction” and since she was streched out lying down on the seats and was bright red from sunburn anyways, they rushed her off to a doctor, and I went in with her (sure, I’ve only ever met her at parties basically when I’ve been very drunk, but Jeremy was in no state to go to the hospital with her, and I figure it’s good of me to bond with flatmates’ girlfriends. To say nothing of the fact that I was kinda scared and like to help out in an emergency). Anyways, the doctor gave her some antibiotics and sent us off back home. She felt better after some panadol and a sleep.

I missed a significant part of Miss World, plus I’d accidently found out who’d won anyways, so that ruined a bit of the night, but ahh well. Jodie and Helen both left after Miss World, as did Nige and Andy. But Maree showed up then, which was sweet as bro. We played Bluffinitions. It was very amusing. I won. All those words we’d never heard of before!

I had a headache, so I’m going to manipoo now.

“Actually I quite like Waikato Draught” – Helen

So my official title is “Communication Assistant” and I know how much I’m getting paid per week, and it’s quite nice – well, more than three times as much as my current income anyways, and yeah, it’s all quite exciting. I start next wednesday, and before then, I have a whole mountain of paper to read my way through. It’s slow progress, but by the end of February, y’all will be able to ask me ANYTHING about wastewater and I’ll be able to tell you. So that’s exciting.

Today there were chainsaws and sunshine and landlady’s sister, and as a consequence, there’s no nasty tree outside my window. Hurrah for that! And Brad mowed the lawn, which inspired me to do the lawns, and clean out the drain in the bathroom (some bitch sheds her long brown hair all over the place!) and put out about 12 bags of newspapers for the paperchase. House cleaning is good. Kate B ran off with my car for a couple’o hours cos it has a tow bar and hers doesn’t to put her stuff in storage. Jeremy hasn’t moved his stuff out of the lounge yet though.

Jeremy was watching The Muppets Celebrate Jim Henson this afternoon, and I got teary. I conceed that I’m a headcase, yes. But Jim Henson DIED, okay? Have you ever seen muppets crying? It’s not a happy sight, I tell you! I made vegetable soup, and it was really nice.

Brad’s got part time work at More FM. Clay’s working at a media monitering place. We’re so Savvy. Of course, I have a PR job instead of a multimedia job, and that’s just fine with me. Clay rang on the way home today and asked if I wanted anything, so i said “summer ale”. We moved the lightest couch onto the deck out the front of the house, which we foolishly have neglected until today when the bushes had all been trimmed back and sat out there. I was hoping to do some dancing, but then Jan – Clay’s friend that we don’t like – showed up and her and Clay went off to get dvds and stuff from the supermomarket. I rang our friends and made sure they were invited to Thanksgiving Lunch. Hayley got all confused, cos I’ve never talked to her on the phone before, and straight away I was like “Hi, this is Joanna McLeod from Garland here; I’m just ringing to confirm your reservation for Sunday”. Well, I thought I was pretty funny anyways. Godboy Peter can’t come (we have a $500 that he’ll ADMIT to being Christian again before 2005) but pretty much everyone else is. I was stoked that Helen can make it. She sent me email yesterday that said “THis is so freaky deaky, trippy dippy. I just came into your website to try and find your email details, and there you leave me my own personal details to get in touch. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, how lovely. I’ve always wanted to be the person who gets their own message. ” which made me giggle for ages. And Andee sent me email today too so it’s been a good day, emailwise. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want you to email me anyways! I like email from people called Ernest.

I hope it’s as sunny tomorrow as it was today – I want to do lots and lots of washing and stuff. I’m trying to tidy the house and my room before I start work next week. I was going to clean my room today, but then I somehow got sidetracked into talking to Olivia about rockstars. Well, no ‘somehow’ about it – I talked to Olivia because she’s the bee’s knees. Jeremy mentioned later something about our dumbass oven and how it dropped open on him at a part one time, and I was like “do you feel kind of like you’ve always watched these pop stars on telly and now you’re meeting them finally? I mean, you always used to come to parties here, and now you live here”. He just laughed at me. I guess that’s the appropriate response. I laugh at me. Time goes by so fast.

“am I famous for just one thing?”

7am, I’m lying happily in bed, fast asleep when all of a sudden Maree comes in my room and jumps on my bed. Who gave her a key to our house??? Oh yeah, that was me. Whoops.

Oh, just before I go any further, Helen Urban – email me!. I have no contact details for you, girl. Ta.

Today I eventually got my shit together and went into tech to burn a copy of my cd rom, and put my other stuff together, but the goddam fucking lab was being rehauled so I couldn’t. I went to another lab to print out my cv, but of course in that lab, the printer was un-networked. Grrrrr! Very annoying. So I went home, then went to the bank to pay rent, and did the vege shopping instead. Vegtamables.

Later in the evening, Brad and I went over to Maree’s to watch “3rd Watch” because she’s being The Nanny Named Fran again, and couldn’t leave the kids. Brad went back home afterwards to eat dinner, so Maree and I sat around her kitchen table drinking tea and feeling like terribly old adults, me reading Christian magazines while she talked to James on the telephone. The rest of Garland came back with Brad – well, Jeremy Clayton and Kara anyways, and we played Postits. Clayton was Dirk Diggler, and we all guffawed mightily when he asked if he was known for just one thing. It felt strange to have the whole posse there, but to not actually be @Garland.

Kate B officially moves her stuff out on Thursday. Yesterday it was a year since Simon told me he was moving out, thus setting in place a chain of events that has been….interesting… to say the least. Well. I’ve been doing pass-throughs of her room to retrieve stuff that belongs to me – makeup and jewellery and towels. She gave me five boxes of condoms from Family Planning, because yeah, I really need them right now. They’re extra thick ones, which Jeremy told me are like gumboots. Nice.

I don’t know how to cook Roast Turkey, but we’re doing Roast Turkey for Thanksgiving Lunch on Sunday. It was going to be dinner, but Miss World’s on that night, so we have to watch that!

I haven’t written up my crazy night on Saturday, have I? Well, should I do that now? Possibly yes, yes I should. Okay then. It was Andy’s 21st, so me Clay and Brad drove out somewhere way way west in my car – I was happy to drive, because as the invitations said, by request there was no alcohol but a delicious fruit punch would be served. It was in a sports hall, which was a little newer than many sports halls, so that was cool. Andy’s mother’s kept the most amazing records of him growing up – writing down all his funny quotes and recording soundbytes of him ever since he was two. Listening to her speech, I was just thinking “awwwwww, i want a baby so i can follow them like this too!”. Incidently, Kate Benton dreamt that I was actually three years younger, and also pregnant with my ex’s kid. Thanks Kate!

Anyways, lots and lots of Andy’s friends and parents and church members made speeches. Brad and Nigel did one together, and played the “Big Tittie Monday” song Andrew wrote to promote Ryan&Jarrod’s Big Tittie Monday radio show – I dunno if the Salvation Army members fully appreciated it for the true piece of genius it is. I’m so going to get a copy of it. I must make a multimedia section for my site – I can also put in the video footage of Kate M talking about my horrible death, and oooh the video of Dancing Simon. Heheehe, I love that video so much! Anyways, eventually all the speeches were over, and we’d even prayed a little (which I thought was kinda nice actually, although when I prayed it wasn’t to any religion or to any being that I feel I know) and we all ate far too much sugary food. Andy wanted to dance then, so naturally, the Gang was called on to start off the dancing, so we did. Sugar sugar sugar is a mad thing – I even ended up dancing a jig, or trying to anyways. Nigel stagedived off a chair and we caught him. It was also nice that it was good wholesome alcohol free fun too, for a change. Not that it’d last though…..

Okay, I’m bored now. Tomorrow I will write up motorway chases, banging on windows, bathroom conversations, long walks, Brendon Lovegrove talking about my clit, barking, and the casino.

“am I famous for just one thing?”