The fancy dress ball in sixth form

Tonight while I was waiting for cabs for the last of my guests and we were looking at my colour-hued bookcase, so I pulled things at random to show how their spines were different colours, and one of those things was my sixth form diary, so I started reading an entry out for random’s sake, but their taxis showed up. So you get the full text now.

Wow, what a weird, wacky and somestimes wonnderful night. I spent the day removing hair from my legs
which were then left silky smooth after I shaved patches that I’d skipped and applied some lotion and baby oil. Anyways the rest of the day, I stressed out with Mum about my dress and doing other beautifying things. Then, I cooked dinner and stressed out cos Penny and Sarah were late. Finally they showed up with Dyland, and Mum & Neil finally left.

So, I cracked open the champagne and we ate chicken & tarragon pasta – which Penny & Sarah loved but Dylan didn’t. Making conversation was weird, like I was trying to talk to Dylan without being too obvious. So we talked about his fetish for women’s underwear (which he denied) and the school papers (we’re both editors). He couldn’t believe that Onslow’s were worse – we showed him! Then, after cake, we all ran around in a flurr getting ready, except for Dylan who settled down to call Daniel and Peter I wonder what he said to them! Nevermind. I did my makeup and put on my dress then I ran around trying to find a German plug so Sarah could blowdry her hair. The hall was really dark cos a light bulb was dead and I was just walking up to it, and the cupboard door was slightly open, then suddenly I see these two eyes! I screamed so loudy, then I like, fell to the ground and just sat there in shock. Fucking Dylan man! It was then that I realised how low my dress was, and that I didn’t haqve the tits to support it. Dylan told me to eat my broccoli! Yeah, what ever! I think I’ll just take a moment here to point out that I realise I’m like “Dylan Dylan Dyaln”. It gets worse!

Anyways… So I was looking all gorgeous. Penny had fixed my hair and my crown and I felt really good. Then of course I knocked off my crown getting into the taxi, and my skirts trailed in the mud. Typical, man! Anyways, we got to Abbys and were greeted by “Oh my god, that’s so coo, pretty, cute etc”. They (Rosalie, Ammy, Ireana & Abby) all said I looed really good, so I was happy. Ireana’s breasts were popping out of her dress. Being tinge typsy, I said “Why did you think I was going to be mean to you? I know we don’t always get on but…” And we hugged – kodak moment. We had to tak squillions of pictures, naturally! Abby’s mother was like “I don”t know you so Abby said “That’s Joanna” and her mother was like “Oh, _ I know who you are_” and everybody laughed. Geez, I wonder what she told her!

I was sitting on the sofa for a while with Abby & her friend, and (I was quite drunk) I apologised for being such a bitch last year. It was so strange! Flashback city, man! Then I had a heart ot heart with Anita E about this guy Gareth. More pictures…. After a while, I was sitting with Dylan, enquiring about Ben. Suppodedly he’s got a new girlfriend slut called Jess who’s making him talk like a homie! I sai I’d hate her too then, and he was like “get over him, Joanna!” I saaid “I am! I’m in love with him but I’mm over him!” and “it’s just that he was such a nice guy” but he said “No, Ben is not a nice guy”. He said it a lot actually. Then I said “Well he was only my second kiss, so I have a right to be obsessed – the first one doesn’t count!” And he was like “Only your second kiss?” (Now that I’m sober, that seems sarcastic, but I’m not sure) so I said “Yeah well, according to Sarah, she’s the only person you’ve ever kissed”. Of course, she came up then, which iced the conversation for a while, but then he was like “I’ll always remember my first kiss – it was s good” and I responded “Me too – it was horrible/scary, I was pinned to the wally by a bouncer in a nightclub – but I’m not drunk enough to talk about that…”

That’s about all of our fascinating conversation that I can remember, except that the whole way through he was complaining about Abby’s short skirt – “Notice how she sticks her legs up in every picture?” – He’s such a bastard, man! Trouble is, he’d only pilfed a little bit of my vodka, so he was practically sober – oh shit! God, I wonder if he’ll tell Ben that I love him! Could be interesting!

We left for the ball in 2 shuttles – I sat on the floor next to Nicola, nuzzling Penny (who thought we were going to Hamilton) an d laughing at Rosallie who kept on telling me to pull my dress up – Jason Dimic could’ve had a god look, had he been so inclined!

Finally we got there, got photographed, went to the loos, sat ouside in the freezing cold. Time is a wee bit muddles now, ‘cos of the wine I drank at Abby’s ver quickly, with vodka and coke too, so I’ll synopsis/summarise: Sarah vanished reall early on – never to be seen agan. They had a room at Trekker’s! Dirty couple! Penny vanished for a tim too, but that was coo. I hung around outside with Justina and Karen and Sam Bedford for a while. Then I was inside with Jess, and we went dancing with Brendan Frater & John Student Rep. Damn, I felt cool! I reminded Brendan of Kiwi Ranch & grabbing Roxanne – he didn’t remember it! Techno rocks! It was so cool! I must’ve been drunk! Then Tamati finally showed up, and I took him & Sam B to see the Bakehouse. I held an arm of each of them – I didin’t want to let Sam Bedford go. I was so weird. Like, Tamait did this monologe-ish thing, and we were standing so we’dve been close (Sam and I) and – I might’ve been slightly mistaken, but I think there was a slight spark – I’m not sure though. We’d been talking earlier – I told him it was hi sduty to get me stoned. Fucking hell man! I guess he’s rich though!

Penny was always talking to the Bouncer dude, then, near the end when most everyone had gone, it was like a fight between him & Graham on the dance floor! I was just laughing! Then, when Grahem won, I went & talekd to Jess – told her briefly about Ben but also, more importantly, how I’m half in love with Sarah’s boyfriend – a friend wh doesn’t have to be biased! It was really cool! John B got with Christy, the stupid bastard! We cabbed home with KateB – she stopped me from getting in the caar with the drunken bouncer, thank god! I can’t believe how stupid I was going to be! Sore feet, lot earring, laddered stokcingt. Penny got with Graham. God, I cannot like Dylan. I won’t let myself.

One response to “The fancy dress ball in sixth form”

  1. omg.. that is the same dialogue i wrote in my diary around the same age. oh yeah.


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